They're Back !!!!

King Camper Husband Man made it back from his boyfriend weekend. He said he tried to call. And call. And call. And call again... Aha... my ESP was working nicely... I knew he made it up there alright...So, he's just sitting in the kitchen reading the newspaper, minding his own business... doing his own thing, making some hamburgers on the BBQ (very low maintenance). Oh, and the Pip is back... yes, The Missy Madmouth is Back. The Boy and I went to go pick her up this afternoon... "oh, her" he says... "couldn't we just forget about her...because I kind of already did, and leave her where she is...the neighbourhood has been nice and quiet without her". "Come on boy, face the music.. life isn't the same without our Pip", I say. "Yes, it's peaceful, quiet,  and no silly hissing girls running around MY house", he says. Well, you do have a point... let's go Mr. Comedy.....

( oh a side bar from last night...... )....I was here, at my post... and Mr Funnyman comes walking in the kitchen from his friends next door, they had been bouncing on his trampoline... it's about 10:40, "where is everybody?", he asks... "It's just me Mr. Funnyman, all on my lonesome, me, the keyboard and my thoughts" I say. He sits in the kitchen chair and sighs.... then says: (He comes up with some ...hmmm I'll guess southern drawl...) "What about me mama, I'm here with ya... you must'nt forget about me...". I crack up.  Nice boy, real nice.........................

anyways... back to business................so, the girls home. IMMEDIATELY IT STARTS. "Well you know.. I am board, and I think I am thirsty" she begins.... I look at the clock. Hmmm, she's been home long enough to hug her Super Camper Dad... and look at her room. 2 minutes. Yae. "You go fuss", I say to her... "you go find a friend". Ha, she forgot the drink... I think to myself as she marches across the street to ambush her friend that was locked away in her home. Life is good... until the friend had to go in. Now she's back.. and she's pissed... and guess who she is taking it out on... me. Me, in my garden. I was just happily watering and feeding my flowers. Then SHE arrived. Now she's thirsty and hungry..... and mad. SHIT!!!!! She wants a TOFU milkshake. "Can't you just eat the hamburger that Grama made for you, and I brought home because I knew you would do this????" I asked her. I don't like hamburgers she said. " Freaking Liar" was the first thought running through my head... but me, being the ADULT, I am not allowed to say that to Miss High Maintenance. "I want a TOFU milkshake, as she holds the package in her hand....(this is not safe... ). "Can you ask Daddy to peel back the lid, and you can eat like a pudding.... "No! It's a milkshake or nothing! she yells (you bet it's nothing missy I think). "Pardon me"....(I eye her).. then, in a calmer tone she repeats it. That's when King Camper Super Evil Dad pipes up... Pip, that's enough, bring it here...... but it was too late... she had already tossed the TOFU out across the patio... see that... see that.... I opened it just fine, she states... I didn't want the stuff anyways. "Miss Fusspot... go to your room please" I call from the backyard. "Fine! I was heading there anyways...." as I hear her footsteps march into the distance. Ahh.... she's back, she's back, she's back... I say to myself as I finish watering my odd assortment of flowers. Cicely on the otherhand is having a nice refreshing TOFU break fresh off the deck. Eventually I make my way over with the hose... it was an easy clean up. Great. She's back.. and full of remorse... crap. Miss Blondy is busy bawling. I remind her of her badness. She claims she wasn't. Pardon me, throwing TOFU across the patio is not bad... well it isn't good missy. So then she apologizes, and then states clearly she is thirsty, and that's it. Fine... go get a drink... have some Soya Milk... and so off she went... tear stained.... but a bit remorseful. ( I think). Well, by the time I have made it out front with my watering can and plant food. There's Pip; on the front step eating another  (and proudly opened by her) TOFU container... this time in her favourite Barbie bowl. "See what I did", she happily admits. Great... did you get whatever you needed to drink I ask her. "Oh yes, see". (she has the BIGGEST glass possible... full to the brim with Soya Milk). So the young lady (she's 13, and our babysitter) from next door comes over. Pip finds a book then reads to Tina.... and finally, when all is said and done.. I ask Miss Pip "did you finish your TOFU"... "oh no" she says... while I wasn't looking... some ants crawled in it.