Monday, July 31, 2006

Now what....

There is nothing like having the E.R.T. (boys in black) to be positioned in your neighbourhood to make you feel really safe. Especially when they bring in their helipcopter, and it flies overhead for about an hour or so. Yes, it's a special feeling to live in a place where you feel it is safe to let your children out to play, without some loser crackhead to be out wondering the streets, only to return to his whole and barricade himself there, then have the boys in black come and swarm him.

In other things special all about the husbandman:.....

The husbandman has this week off on holidays. He informed me of that fact last night. I believe that I was informed on that fact some time ago, although I can't exactly trace the moment the facts were spilled to me, and then lost.

The husbandman is currently grouting the new tile floor. He never wants to be a grouter guy... ever.

The husbandman may currently be in my badbooks of husbandry. He has kind of slightly informed me that he may not be doing the kitchen reno as he had hoped. I think he may just be getting to see how far my hair can stand up on the top of my head... so far, I am feeling pretty staticky.

The husbandman went to the dump today, he took the boy with him. He woke the boy up, and gave him five minutes notice. "Wake up, get dressed, you are coming to the dump with me".. I believe is what he said to the sleepy eyes Hamsterson. We need to work on the husbandmans timing, and speaking skills.... but for the moment, he is on holidays... and while on holidays.. he must work, work, work.

In other things that are of interest to me only...

I went to the library today, and took out the book that I have been waiting forever for.... and now I must go and disappear... and read my next adventure.

We'be been skunked!

The girl and I headed out for our favourite late evening summer past time last night. We found the perfect viewing spot for watching our blueberry loving black furry friends popping out from their forest of tranquility. WE waited and we waited.... there were rows of blueberries awaiting their silent arrival, but it would have to wait for another time.... the only thing that popped out of the forest last night was... you guessed it... a skunk. It's no wonder our furry guys in black remained in hiding.... nobody likes to be skunked!
I am not entirely sure what is that I expected out of this, other than what the title states. Something out of the normal for me... a mystery thriller. I was intrigued up until I started hitting myself on the head with the book because of the characters blatant stupidity. None the less, I enjoyed the book due to the fact that it was different than my regular reads... but now my head kind of aches.. so I better change it up a bit from here on out.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Dangerously Quiet!!!

That is me. The fingertips have been silent, although I haven't been silent. Mind you ... I have been organizing numbers from one to nine, and other junk... and doing book reading things.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

DUCK.... It's a bear!

Guess which one I saw earlier?
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Looking at starfish

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Amongst a large assortment of lifey details that got accomplished today... I also read this book; believe it or not. Mind you, compared to the latest reads this didn't take a huge thought process to plough through, but rather a good grasp of words stuck to a page, and no slight on the author either... a fluff book that is good to re-engage a lost reader...

Sunday, July 23, 2006

a bit better, than the last read...although I find all the action happens at the end.... and then it gets gushy...

Friday, July 21, 2006

Thursday, July 20, 2006


I have to love that PIP of mine. She is one tough cracker....

The other day she showed me the inside of her mouth. Well, that is once I got her eyeballs to stop rolling into the back of her head, and opened her mouth at an angle that I could actually see into. She was trying to show me the stubborn tooth that would not come out, but now had decided that it was going to be little bit wiggly. Much to my wierdness, there was her other tooth, creeping up from depths of her jaw, and beginning to protrude SIDEWAYS. OH, freakmagnets, I kind of had a little spaz. Only a little spaz mind you... all because I have been watching her teeth carefully, and they have all managed to find enough space in her face that would lend her a healthy and straight smile... much to my relief. But then I saw the tooth. RATS! So I told her that she just needed to get that very much anchored tooth out of her head.. and she set to the task. For two days she worked at wiggling that thing whenever I mentioned it. She even took supplies to her camp, just in case it popped out while away from home. The silent husbandman and I were out on the patio when we heard this yell "OW!!" from within the home. The PIP walks to the new laundry room door and shows us her handfulls of tissues.. "have a look at all this blood... just look at it all" she says, and then walks down the steps to show me her new kind of empty space in her mouth... " and the blood just keeps on pouring out" she says, as she stuffs another wad of paper towel in her mouth... she turns to walk back up the steps and through the laundry door, but stops.. "and you know the worst part, is when it made the cracking sound when I pulled it out"... and she walks back in the house to find her newest lost tooth a home for the night, before the tooth fairy arrived.

The next morning I ransacked the silent husbandman jeans... and gave her five bucks for her handywork, plus another five bucks for the tooth that she lost a couple weeks ago, but the tooth fairy kept managing to forget to arrive..


Airmile Junkie

My stalker sister turned airmile junkie turned up on my doorstep in the early evening yesterday. The bonus airmiles coupons had arrived in the local paper which meant it was time to visit the expensive grocery store, and collect our miles. I have one problem though.. I am cheap. What a shock that is. I like to collect the one hundred bonus airmiles when I spend one hundred dollars. It keeps it simple for me, and, I do not feel that I am handing over a chunk of my plastic ( I pay with my airmile mastercard ), and spending that extra arm I do not have.. and how odd is that!? I did manage to collect on some bonus airmiles on some food items that I will use, but that is looking far into the future, when the rainy season hits.... although I could probably try and cook the extra food I have with the temperatures that are going to hit this weekend. Being an airmile junkie has paid off, I did manage to collect an extra 125 miles above my coupon airmiles, and see other airmile junkies at the check out... HI LUJZA!!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Midweek Madness!

Complete madness I say... as the husbandman pointed out to me this morning. He asked me what I was going to do with my day, and I told him that it needed to be top secret, even I wasn't going to find out until the time. In actuality I have been having a slight holiday this week, due to the lovely and TIRED chicklets that are attending their day camp. As luck would have it, the stalker sister also has this week off, and her two chicklets are attending the same daycamp... HOW ODD IS THAT!

In other things crazed....

We skipped over to my long time friends house the other day, and visited her family for the day. What an adventure... many tall children (and some almost not children, but young adults actually) lingered about, swam in the pool, or attempted to swim... (the bathing suits were applied but not used). It was a great day... I even heard the husbandman speak as well. He even ventured to be chatty amongst the friends. I probably should have brought a voice recorder. I turned truely impressed when my long time friend started up the BBQ, although I believe this to be wrong.. ((as the king usually does BBQing kingly things with it... and I just hunt and gather for the Kingly BBQing adventures))... I noticed her skill in lighting the BBQ, something that I never try and attempt, because why would I ... the King does it. I like that King. Anyways.. my friend and her purple skewered chicken, and additional protein sources like hamburgers and hotdogs (for the colour challenged... AKA Hamerston) were added to the great BBQing extravaganza. I stood back in awe... well, plus the fact that my friend had everything EVERYTHING done. I will have to learn her secrets... or not. In fact, I watched her style, and wish not to duplicate it... as that would make it challenging when the King likes to do why get in his way and complicate matters.... see, that's what I like simple solutions to lifes little trifles...

In other things ....

We did a quartet scrapping adventure last evening. It was a good evening... everybody accomplished great feats with their paper crafts, and went away with another page to add to the scrapbooks. Although I am believing that we will have to add some cash to the red wine fund & call it the "drink & scrap till you drop slush fund". That might be an idea.

Off I go... on the secret adventure of the day... I don't even know what I am doing yet...

Sunday, July 16, 2006

A dab of honey

It's Sunday morning.. and I am not at work. It has been very pleasant... just the thoughts of being at home, rather than at work, where people are workish.. of course...

I have now drank a second cup of Earl Grey tea with a dab of honey, and a splash of milk.. to round out the morning. Although, I am unable to do the Sunday morning Soduko as it arrives on our doorstep with five stars, which make that an impossibility for me.. I will have to search out my trusty side book that I keep in my bag.

Now, there is nothing finer to a Sunday morning at home without a lovely breakfast to come my way. This mornings fare has come freshly reheated from the microwave, piping hot. I believe that it has a genuine place next to a lovely cup of Earl, with it's dab of honey... yes it does.

Spaghetti Squash.

I kid you not.. happy Sundaying.

The dragon that came to light...

The other day on very short notice, the boy called up his friends an invited them out to a movie. There's nothing like a delayed birthday gathering of friends... only a mere 7 months later. It was the perfect day to see a movie, since it was drizzling out, and the outdoor pools would be closed, because we can't have the patrons heads getting wet while they bob in the pool. More importantly, they can't have the lifeguards getting wet as they sit and watch munchkins float about in the inclement weather... because those big umbrellas that they sit under, only come out in the middle of August, when the now wonderfully tanned lifeguards are sick of the sun.. but the umbrellas can not be used when it's raining, no way, no how. But of course, that is not what this story is about.

Away we go, down the highway to the movie theatre. We arrived a bit early so we could saunter across the parking lot to TIM HORTON'S, where I could buy myself a lovely cup of bresh brewed coffee, and have real cream in it.. ( I have been forgetting to buy cream.. which disables the coffee feature in the homestead )... I also bought the group of gangbusters a donut each, where we then sang the boy happy birthday.. because you can only sing happy birthday wishes with something gooey in front of you.. well, that's my rule in life!

I buy the tickets, and spend a fortune, and then we make our way to the drink and popcorn counter.... where I spend another fortune. Actually the fortunes were just about equal. We give the tickets to the guy that takes tickets.. where he points to my small cup of coffee and tells me that I can not take that into the theatre. I then point to the four others sporting large drinks and large popcorn bags and my one popcorn bag then say to him.. I have just spent eighty dollars in your movie theatre, and half of that was on popcorn and drinks, would you mind letting me sit and finish drinking my coffee in the theatre where I can smack myself and wonder what kind of idiot I am.. I think I would like that very much. He told me that was fine, and to go ahead. I think I might have scared him.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Trails of tales

This is the lookout..
Westminster Abbey
"Bearly There Temp Agency"
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Oh! what do we have here...

There are such things that are called kitchen tables. We own one, although you wouldn't know it, well, except if you were here on Tuesday between the hours of 0900 and 10:15.. I think I saw the surface of it that day. Ever since then, something has happened:

The Pip has opened up for business.

Right in the smack dab centre of the kitchen table. She doesn't believe that a kitchen table can serve a purpose of remaining clear and free from clutter, especially when it's her clutter.

In inquired as to how come she couldn't open up her business in her very own room, where she actually has her very own desk.. that would long to be utilized in opening up a business. She said it already has it's own business, it's busy being messy. Enough said.

So this is what I have had to live with ... while we are at home and not busy being at the swimming pool... which I might say to all my laughing friends out there....HA!... this idea is working out great.... they swim until they sink, then I go get them... and then they are happy that I have saved them from the deep waters of Centenniel Pool, and they come home all quiet and lovely.. so scoff as you will... I am waiting to see just how much chlorine children can absorb before "things" start to happen to them..... because gills can just be stitched up again!

Anyways.. back to the PIP's new business.

She has now confiscated the kitchen table, and has filled, arranged and littered it with anything "officey" she can get her hands on... ( she even tried to sneak the stapler to the movie theatre the other day.. just in case she had to do some STAT stapling while we were watching the movie). OH brother.. and the best part... she has an answering service that she just presses a button, and a message plays, in some far off New York accent. "This is Mr.Kinkel's office, how may I direct you call?" Then of course, she has her "play" cell phone that rings off the hook AND non stop ( she has two lines going at all times)... (because it is a stand in for the other old phone we used to own). I have a rainbow of post-it's strewn across the table with encrypted messages that she can only decipher, and if we are not careful we crash into while she 'goes mobile'. She has managed to buck the boss for an extended lunch hour, which she then gets her HUGE teddy bear to sit in her spot... (A.K.A. "BEARLY there temp agencies"), which takes her calls while she is out for lunch, which at that point her cell phone is with her, and she continously presses the button to make it ring.

For an added bit of business for her... I have tossled up her desk, permanently borrowed things and knock over her files... just to make it feel real enough for her for tomorrow morning...

Mr. Kinkel is not going to be happy...

It's Poison alright...

The Poisonwood Bible, by Barbara Kingsolver.
649 pages, and I am none the wiser, or far too shallow to absorb.
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So, what did you do the other day?

Here is a note that I wrote to an acquaintance... I may not hear from him for a real long time, if ever again at all. ( I have highlighted some of my previous writing adventures about my cooking abilities... make that inabilities to him... but this next story.. is a bit out there... well, there's a NUT out there for everyone.....)

Well hello Allan....

I am well, I am very well actually at this exact moment, (despite the fact that at this moment I am sitting in the darkness of my kitchen, with only the computer screen glowing away, and all the bugs that have crept into our house throughout the evening have headed towards me... or shall I say THE LIGHT!. I am now defending my space, well actually my face, and slapping myself silly in order to rid them from flying in front of me) back to other useless matters... I have endured 649 pages of a book that I really wanted to NOT read, but once you start something finish... I couldn't stand it... almost as much as my cooking adventures! Oh the book, The Poisonwood Bible, save yourself 649 pages worth of reading, and attempt something else, (like dusting behind your computer desk)... and if you may have read it... I feel for you.

In other things as not as exciting as the first paragraph:

My cooking adventures have been tamed since BBQ season is here. The King cooks, and I just throw together "salady things", that I clearly can not ruin. Mind you, the children hate me... due to the colourful array of offerings that unfold infront of them.... BUT... here is something that I learned yesterday.. which made me chuckle..... SO YOU BETTER CHUCKLE ABOUT THIS......

After topping up my 16 year old white SUV with two litres of oil, and some power steering fluid which is not correct for this vehicle, but I pour it in anyways..... the chicklets and myself were off on an adventure.... yes we were!

I was confident in my "occassional occuring memory" that I could find our destination point... I was not going to look on a map.. when I surely was almost positive that I might remember that I knew how to get to "the place of anticipation"....I have my standards..

PAUSE: ( I need a moment.... I have to kill four, no make that five, the cousin has arrived, little tiny flying zippy bugs that somehow keep giving me whiplash....) ok, I'm back...hold onto your hat....

We make it to our first destination.... and instead of getting out of the vehicle.. I sit and stare up at the sky... it was quite a sight.. although I couldn't see much sky,but rather a huge apple tree.. with hundreds of apples bobbling above my head. As always, I have my trusty digital with me, and start to snap pictures.. when all of a sudden something snaps behind me.. oh, right.. it's the chicklets... snapping, sniping, hissing and swiping at each other... my moment of tranquility lost... so I embraced the moment and snarled/growled back at them to rejoice in the great wonders above their heads,( I had to tell the lovely and wonderful, but very blond daughter to actually look out the sunroof, as she was dazed by the Burgundy upholstery above her) and be thankful that it wasn't quite apple harvesting season... Eventually we enter and then exit the Matsqui produce place, with a real-live large brown paper bag full of things that would make a vegetarian drool, well except for the chocolate covered POKY sticks.. and off we go. But that wasn't for long... I believe that I had somehow picked up while I was at the produce store a boy crocodile and it's evil sibling, sister crocodile and they wouldn't shut up, actually it was the start of quite a psychotic event that started in the back seat, and ended up in the drivers seat.. I believe my head even popped off I pulled (actually I whipped) over to the side of the road, and hissed at the two of them to exit my vehicle.. yes, I hissed quite a bit.((get out...!!!GET OUT!!!!!! GGGGGEEEETTTTT OOOOUUUTTTT!!!!!)).. when they both refused to get out, I got back in... and continued driving to our wonderful and tranquil place.... GOD.. did I need to get there fast..... they had already killed my sunroof apple adventures, and they had made my head pop off... I was worried for what they were capable of next!

We drove for a while.. because, as I stated before... I was relying on a memory that is ultimately vague at the best of times, and I had only been to this spot once in my life... I had an inkling as to where it was supposed to be.. but I believe I was just heading straight to the mountains, rather than looking up on the top of the mountain for the "point of interest"...

Since the lovely and wonderful, but worry filled Hamsterson had been watching the gas gauge, I figured it was time to fill the SUV... as it was 15 cents a litre cheaper way out yonder, it seemed to make good sense to me. Little did I know, while my back was turned, the "destination point" was right behind me.. but I did not know that.. and off we went.. adventuring some more... the girl happy with her peas, the boy with an apple, and I was sipping on a sparkling rain, which I might add does happen to taste good with vodka.. but since it was 1:30 in the afternoon.. I didn't happen to have any on me. (he he he). Eventually we came to a bend in the road... and I clearly knew that I had gone to far, and turned around.

WHALA... right there, facing right back into the windshield in front of was the WESTMINSTER ABBEY.. calling to us, from way up there on the mountaintop. Yes, easier said than done. My next step was getting to the top of the mountain.. and finding the entrance. I believe it would help if the signs were actually posted in the correct direction. I kid you not... one sign said "this way" and one sign said "that way"... this is worse than a good day in the kitchen with me... I ended up BACKING up on a hill... just because I saw this little road, that went way way up a big steep mountain... but as I found out.. the car ahead of me had a key to the gate.. which only let that one person in.. and not us... clearly I was feeling keyless, and clueless... not a good feeling...well, since I had probably used every possible swear word in front of the kids back at that little unfortunate incident where I whipped the doors open and demanded that they leave (I will add here, that I had the good sense to ask them to leave via the sidewalk side of the vehicle...) I decided that it was best to stay calm... and breathe deeply....I finally stopped exhaling after five minutes.. this surely couldn't be this challenging.... it was at this point that the little rusty and dusty trapdoor to the memory bank opened... and I ever so slightly remembered that I could get into our TRANQUIL SPOT IN THE SKY via Dewdney Trunk Road, and not the other DTR, or the other one, it's THAT Dewdey Trunk Road. And guess what... we made it! Oh yes we did....we wandered along the trails, and found the lookout that overlooked the Fraser River, and Matsqui, or whatever the hell else that was on the other side of that river, and we looked down into people's back yards, and watched the trains glide, and the sun dance through the breaks in the waves of clouds, and the river flow. It was all quite nice, it was a mind clearing event, and both of the kids enjoyed visiting the Westminster Abbey, mind you they were even happier when we got off the trails, which we appeared to get lost on for a short time only mind you..... well except for the fact that the lovely and blond Pippy girl was quite insistent that the Hamsterson should be allowed to go into the church.. and "who cares about wearing shorts in the church".. and "who are these people that think they can make rules".. yes, we couldn't quite talk her down over that rampage, and thus steered clear from entering the church, or going near it...

Eventually we left, it had been lovely.. well, it was lovely, until the PIP got tired of eating her peas, and refused to eat an apple, did not want any cherries, was not a rabbit so refused to eat lettuce.. she needed some food, and that food needed to come from McDonalds. NOW! Here we go.

Now I am not quite certain how this happened.. but once again.. I somehow managed to find myself driving in a different location than I had anticipated. Before I knew it, I was back out on the highway, and I had missed the downtown core of Mission altogether... where I had had the notion that I was going to purchase some coffee for the drive home.. and find find something for the chicklets.. but this didn't happen, and I didn't feel like back tracking.. MAN, Mission has traffic... The whole while the girl was stating her great need for something, of course failing to reach into her handy dandy pick a pea and feed for free bag.... NOOOOO, that just couldn't happen during this ride home.... Luckily through great skill and the power of a DVD, I talked her down, we even passed a McDonalds, as she is quite used to...

However.....I figured that it had turned out to be quite a nice day, despite a couple of psychotic setbacks... but hey, that happens, so you just move on, and enjoy.. and let be what was.. there's no changing what there's no changing... so
I knew of a place... called DAIRYQUEEN. Of course there is this whole driving thing that get's in the way... and I drove straight past it, then had to turn around, but then turned into the wrong street, and had to find my way out.. but we eventually made it to DAIRYQUEEN. Things were looking up.. except for the fact that the place was desolate.. not a soul around, inside or out... I got worried... but.. it was open... well, there was girl at the counter counting money, and wanted nothing to do with helping us. She wouldn't even say HI!, but what she did say was 'WHERE IS THE HELP'.. and out from behind the counter shot three astute friendly smiling young employees, I could tell by their matching uniforms. I pulled out my coupon... because not only am I crazy, I am also very cheap. It's a sad mix... but someone had to end up with it! I ask for TWO Peanut Buster Parfaits. The boy goes into meltdown mode, and just stares at me... (I'm thinking in my head... it's a freaking fancy sundae... which is all you want anyways...!!!!) He doesn't say anything to me, but rather sulks heavily at me, it's a Sundae Hamsterson be happy...he continues to glare. I have to add, he can talk, but chooses to use his form of "magical method of silent conduction of communication" and just looks at me. We all watch as the two girls put together to PB Parfaits, and then one proceeds to dump one onto the ground... where one scoops off the bad ice cream, and puts a lid on it and walks away... ( I was kind of thinking.. is that for the "non-witnessing drive-through customers).. anyways, she disappears with the "bad" sundae, and the other girl continues to start making another sundae. In a matter of moments we have THREE brand new Peanut Buster Parfaits staring at us, from the till. The "bad" sundae girl made another sundae, as well as the first sundae girl made another sundae.... we all laughed. OH, I lied, everybody ... but the boy. He doesn't laugh, he proceeds to walk to the other side of this very big Dairyqueen. We find a place to sit... where he refuses to eat his special treat.... ( the girl, much to his shallowness, is finally quiet)... and this is where he informs me... HE DOESN'T LIKE NUTS.


I didn't know he didn't like nuts..... what day did nuts enter the unlikable list I asked him.... WHAT DAY??????????????????

After all of this.. I just wanted him to be happy... and have some happy freaking icecream... with some hot fudge... nothing I scrounged in my lovely bright pink wallet and found another three dollars and twenty nine cents in coins, and sent him to find his happiness....WHAT A NUT!

And there you have... even without cooking, I have food preparation problems.. well, and navigational problems, and psychotic problems.. but we aren't focused on those right now....

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

I am so lost!

I have tried Google Earthing my SIL & BIL... and they are not to be found on the google earth map. I have now emailed for more instructions on how to find them via the computer world. How useless am I ... that I can't even find them on the computer... I could just imagine trying to send them mail... way back when, when there weren't such things as instant messaging, and emails. Yikes. So now that I am completely frustrated with google earth, I will turn to my next source of frustration, ... my book. I hope to finish it tonight, now that I have wasted three quarters of an hour looking for someone that isn't lost... except me.

And today would be....

I have found the computer. How lucky for all of us. I just need to figure out where I have been for the last number of days, now that is a challenge. Although, if I work backwards .. I should be able to retell some events.

  1. For starters.. I woke up this morning. A good start to any day really. I hunted for my book on the nightstand (where I put it last night after reading it)... I absolutely have to finish this book, I am not feeling very connected to it, so therefore am having a "long" read time with it... but I will perservere.
  2. Yesterday was a bit tediuous, I had another date at the dentist.. but this time it was the "cleaning girl", following that the boy needed his braces adjusted, so we had to make it to the orthodontist as well. I did not take the chicklets for their allotted chlorine time, hence the constant "chitter chatter let's attack one another" syndrome that most brothers and sisters are afflicted with in the summer time. Plus, we were at the mall.. where the boy believes that we should stand at attention for 3 1/2 solid hours, so he can stare at games. The girl on the other hand is following the good lead of her mother, and needs to own every single pair of shoes ever created. It turned out to be the boys turn to collect on the shoe gathering option.. and I bought him a new pair of runners, for the second time this year. Yes, this may seem a bit over the top and the generosity scale, compared to the girls "everything under the rainbow" footwear.. but she is a girl, with colourful outfits... so she must have the ensemble. I should note here that I however have gotten over the "shoe" thing for myself... I think the husbandman should count his lucky stars that I have two different size feet, and a foot that doesn't bend, which makes wearing high heels, open toes, sling backs, summer sandals, boots, slides, and flip flops a complete and total non-entity for me... hence the girls growing collection... I must live through somebody, since the boy only get's one pair of shoes on the "occasional" side. It should be noted also that the boy is the king of "pain in the ass" when buying runners. Believe it or not, he considers this type of shopping a valuable waste of time... where he could actually be playing his games. I did have to spell out to him, that he would not be playing his games today, in an effort to concentrate on the "ONE LOUSY PAIR OF RUNNERS" task. The last item on the list was then requested of him... to attempt to show his appreciation for buying him a second pair of runners this year, I asked him to walk around the store to make sure they felt right, and the ultimate request... he had to do it with a smile on his face, and not that disgusting sneer I had been staring at for the past hour and a bit. He managed... and the smile wasn't even crazy glued into place.
  3. The day before was not so challenging, and yet interesting... I was the designated walking woman (the originators movie madness mother had hurt her foot, so I was the stand in) for the boy and his haram of girls, if that makes any sense at all. In reality this was a movie party, where other boys were invited, but jammed out due to their inability to feel confident with a group of crazy girls. The Hamsterson mind you, didn't care... it was his dream day come true, a date with just himself and the television. OH, plus a group of girls, which seemed to have no impact on him. I came to be the walking woman, as I was to collect this gaggle of girls, which took about two hours.. plus stop at the store to gather junk food. When the day was done and over, myself and the actual girls mother walked everybody home.. which took another two hours, as everyone had to hug and say good-bye.... except with the boy. He had managed to connect with another 12 year old boy that was staying at the movie madness mother's house... so he was along for the walk, even though we live the closest to the movie event. Now the girl was cured from her boredom as she went to the pool for her daily dose of chlorine... with her friend.. which she was inflicted with chlorine for many hours.. including that they also had to go to their favourite swimming event "swimfin"... where the girl overcomes her challenges remaining vertical on this earth.
  4. The day before that brought no excitement...I spent the day at work, then came home in the knick of time to take the girl to the pool for a couple of hours where she had to endure the crazy and obnoxious girl from two doors down. I then watched the PIP endure this crazy chick tip her out of her pink inner tube, splash her continously in the face, dive down in front of her whenever the PIP attempted her handstands, and followed her like a bag of catnip when the PIP went to jump off the diving board. It was quite peculiar from my perspective.. so I finally motioned to the PIP to go into the deep water section, in the middle, and the crazy girl from two doors over wouldn't be able to torment her from there. I watched this the whole while I sat on the bleachers, trying to connect with my book. My impossible Soduko puzzle called to me louder than the unconnectable book.
  5. I wont talk about Saturday... I spent the day at work.. doing workish things, funny how that happens.
  6. Friday evening the King made some slushy pink girlie drinks... and there were actual grown up girls here to drink them. Even the census girl came knocking on my door... but I had to turn her and her census away from the pink fru-fru-ness... her and her census were intruders.. in a space where the census had already been filled out, but somehow the "snailmail" people were unable to deliver it....

Friday, July 07, 2006

Things I need to do today:

  1. The dentist and I have a date. I wish I liked him. This is troubling...
  2. Dry the towels from last nights swimming adventure.
  3. Colour the interestingly faded and yet still dark but not dark enough hair.
  4. Do not forget to bring the children to the dentist... they will be going on their swimming adventure after my dentist excursion.
  5. Pack some snacks for the crazy children... that way they do not call home, while they are supposed to be happily swimming and wearing themselves out in the pool for four hours. Of course this limits the fighting time between them... which is ultimately my goal. .. my happiness... I still haven't gotten over being self centered... despite children.
  6. Surprise the husbandman, and have some Friday food in the refridgerator.. he is so loved!
  7. I will have to retrieve the chicklets from the public swimming pool in time to bring the girl to her finswim lessons.
  8. Today would be a good day for chocolate for her!
  9. Right, colour my hair.
  10. I better write number nine on my hand, oh and my vitamins that cure stupidness.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Life on a Thursday

Little did I know that the cop friend of mine really disliked me.... he tried to off me... and not off a cliff, but rather crawling up the mountain to get to the cliff. I kid you not. But he didn't break me... I made it to the top of the cliff... with my walking stick and my heart kerchunking along... but I wouldn't say give... well I almost said give when the hill got so steep I wasn't entirely sure I could get back down again... again, I kid you not. Thank god for insight on the walking stick situation.... man oh man. Then... once we reached the very top of the cliff.. I wanted to chuck my lovely and handsome Hamsterson over the edge... as he did not put the camera in the bag, when I handed it to him, and said... "PUT THE CAMERA IN THE BAG". I was choked... choked and choked again.. mostly because I knew that I was not going to be making this trek probably ever again... and I missed out on a trillion pictures. It was a nice view while we were there. I kind of dreaded falling back down the mountain... but I managed to hold onto that fear... because it seemed that I was the only one with that fear. Well actually... what I really had going on was the visual of me falling into some obscure location, and unable to get up, covered in bear crap and leaves.. and some poor scrawny rescuer person in navy blue would be given the ultimate task of rescuing the high strung crazy lady with really bad hair... all the way back along the trail. Yes, that colourful image played continuously through my head, until I had safely made it through the forest. Yae Me.

And then....while I was out....

I was sitting in my 16 year old white rusting SUV reading another book that I am not sold on, and watching the chicklets swim in the public swimming pool that they had all to themselves.

My friend called me on my cell phone... she just called to let me know that there was a big black bear waffling about the trail right by our house. Lucky me... lucky me, that the only thing that I was watching at that moment were some "dial-a-dopers" doing transactions in their big black mercury car. Nice... very nice....and some really ugly skinny women busy being their customers. I think I am going to write a letter to the city... something to do with the fact that we need to dig up this pool, and place it in a spot that is much more suitable of a location... yes, I will get on that first thing in the morning...

I couldn't do this...

Yesterday we ventured downtown to see "Storyeum". The show itself was very good, although for the price (being the super cheap/thrifty person that I am), I am not convinced that I would be happy being a tourist and seeing this... and as I have just finished reading the book below...(and with a certain amount of insight as well).. I know that money doesn't buy happiness. Anyways... but this isn't what this is about... this is about PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION. Yes, I know ... there was no lead up...


The three of us find our way to the skytrain, and find three seats. The Hamsterson is temporarily happy, as he gets to complete view the ride from the back window. But the grass is always greener somewhere.... and he ends up sitting next to me, and then looking out the side window. Little did we know when we sat down that we had sat behind the monster with the cell phone. For thirty five minutes we sat and listened to the same story over and over and over again.... as she scrolled through her numbers, and kept calling people. I looked up at one stop and this man that had similar features of the devil glared at her.. I am sure that I saw horns peeping out of his thick dark mass of coiffed locks on top of his head, and a spike tail twitching behind him. I do not know how they treat a devil for a stroke... but I am certain his blood pressure was almost beyond the height of the pearly gates... after listening to this woman prattle on and on.

Two stops before our train exit, she bolts... leaving us in the billowing smoke from the overuse of her cellphone. Another reason why I do not commute... except in my vehicle.

Not what I expected:

Boy was I mistaken when I thought that this was to be DIABOLICALLY FUNNY... it was more like DIABOLICAL IDIOCY...

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Visiting the city

Here is the boy... posing at the piano..

We were in Gastown earlier today...

This would be the moment of happiness... yes, and this is the end of that story
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In her favourite location...

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The garden girls...

We couldn't handle the PIP having bangs, "they" scared her brother, plus that included a new knickname... "BANGSY", so she is growing out her brand new bangs in an effort to keep things a little simpler in the home...
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Life as we live it...

At this moment in time the skies have gone cloudy, which immediately changes the aura around us and the space we inhabit. It's an interesting feeling, with the exception that the crows are still noisy.

In other things interesting:

The BIL, SIL, nephew and niece are heading off to Australia . It also sounds easier than 11 simple words. Since they will be gone a year, they have had to pretend they are leaving for good, but really, will be coming back in a years time. They have also had to temporarily "give" their dog away. Interesting fact though... (I can never remember the name... how odd), but I believe they have an Australian cattle dog.. named TAZ. She's quite cute and they would have taken her, had she not had to spend half of the year in quarantine... We would have taken her, if we could have trusted what our "crazy, silly and very scared which equals unpredictable catdog" would have done with TAZ. Even still, if the home that they have leant her to doesn't work out... we will take her... and live the life of two dogs again... we would just make it work with the silly catdog.. I really think once the catdog were to realize that she doesn't need to fear other dogs she would be fine... it's the "what if" that keeps us separated from other dogs... and a huge vet bill.... yes, that sort of small things.. I will miss all of these guys greatly... even though I/we do not see them all the time, and they live about 10 minutes away... (that's counting waiting at lights to cross town).

... The known idiot parents on the crescent both yelled and raged at a bunch of the girls from the crescent on Sunday. The PIP was called a liar by these parents as well. Yes, it was quite interesting, and I missed it all. It was just as well.. I would probably have gone psychotic with these people. I can say they are nothing short of morons with social skills the level of moles. They have one child.. a girl... who is taking after them quite nicely.. and very unfortunately for her. I am a bleeding heart at the best of times, and I am trying to figure out for the life of me how I am going to encourage that the PIP try and play with "that" girl, without the fear of her parents screaming down her throat if she says something wrong to their girl. This is the same girl that PIP refers to her as playing with her is the same as "living in a torture chamber"... so the ideas of how to play with this menace (unfortunately) are coming slowly and painfully...

I was true to my word in regards to the chicklets and swimming. I told them that everyday that we were not doing something during the day... they would be at the public pool to swim... which is why yesterday... I dropped them off, with snacks, towels and brand new brightly coloured tubes to float on.... and with the added threat of "they were not allowed to exit the gates of the pool"... until they see my smiling face... OH, and in lessons learned by the "oh great-one" Hamsterson... I said to him that he needed sunscreen, he sneered at me, and told me he could do it himself.... well, you know the rest of the story....

Also.... last evening I said to the Hamsterson... "let's walk to Roger's"... (it's a video store). The boy couldn't get his shoes on fast enough... and this is a boy that doesn't like walking to school. On that notion.. away we went... to the video store (where he was desperate to buy a game), and then onto Save-on-Foods, to pick up our Storyeum tickets that I got with the points I had collected. We were gone for two hours out walking, but it was a beautiful night... and I told him that this is what summers were made of... I think he grew another 2 inches while walking, and a couple more degrees of handsomeness as well.

I am currently reading a (I think) funny book at the moment... the last two were rather serious... and I need something light and fluffy to rekindle the funny side of me.... On that thought... the catdog is outside in her favourite location at the moment... she is pining away for the husbandman to return.

Monday, July 03, 2006

As promised

Here I am with my cup of coffee.

The things that I know so far in this day:

  1. I went to bed after 1:00 AM
  2. I was awake again at 4:00 AM
  3. I have listened to the morning birds sing, and the idiot crows do their noise thing.
  4. I completed the Soduko puzzle that I couldn't do last night before 1:00 AM.
  5. I took a handful of vitamins last night at 12:30 AM... so am I catching up, or being extra early??? (Well, since they do not seem to be working, I will overdose on them later today.... in great hopes that they will help with my every failing memory)
  6. I have watered the flowers out in the front (to get a head start on the takeover husbandman gardening man).
  7. I have checked my neighbours flowers that I have been in charge of since they went away.
  8. I wandered down the street to the open field and took a bunch of sunrise pictures.... although if I wanted real sunrise, I should have left earlier.. while I was busy watering flowers... now the pictures that I have taken all have trees strategically placed in them, due to the yellow orb in the pictures...
  9. I have spied: the Vancouver cop leaving for work, the running paperman delivering our paper, and "Leo" and his dad out for a walk... (Leo is a beautiful golden retriever... and I don't have a clue what the owners name is.. other than he makes red wine, and he walks his dog....)
  10. AND....I am drinking a lovely cup of java....

Sunday, July 02, 2006

This is what happened...

Only moments ago...... I was trying to clean up after our dinner from earlier with the people traveling/working in Australia for a year. I was very capably tidying up the dishes, and cleaning out the sink... all on my very own... when the contractorman turned housekeeper tells me that the dishwasher is almost empty. On that tip alone... away I went and started emptying the dishwasher... still, I was not having any great difficulties with this. Without a moment to spare, the contractorman turned housekeeper swoops in and takes my spot in the dishwasher location. He moves at the speed of light, and travels in silence..... in mind and body... and completes the task.

I had to explain to the traveling BIL that this is the way it is in this house... I am incapable of doing things because when the contractorman turned housekeeper is around... he is the one that does stuff.... and I am only underfoot. This isn't a complaint, but the actual truth.... plus he does it in silence. I am not complaining, rather explaining.... the only deal that I complain about is the watering of the flowers...

Now, back to my Soduko puzzles and vitamins, which are really not working on my logic or memory at the present time.

Things I am currently thrilled about:

... I will be drinking a cup of coffee in the morning... with cream. I have been out of coffee this past week, and had to finally stop and get some today. I should invite my friend Susan over.... (I once made her stop and pick up cream.. OK, and to come clean on the cream... I even made the people that are leaving for Australia do the same...(but not today.. on an occasion previous to this, and the cream event wasn't the event that made them leave the country either)...... I am just not the dream cream queen that I would hopefully seem.

I don't work enough

The king is idle. Now that the king is temporarily idle from his contractorman chores, he has taken it upon himself to start the housely tidying duties. He has managed quite nicely I have to admit. The whole house was tidied by the time I made it home yesterday. You have to love that. Of course I had planned on this very course of action, for the next week... and he managed it in one day. I can't figure it out.

BUT.... I was traumatized to see him happily talking on the phone, and watering my plants earlier this morning. Now that is not allowed.. under any circumstances. I water my flowers... only me! Yes, ME ME ME!!!! I should reveal the awful truth about it... it is only because I love to water, it's as simple as that. Now he has gone and found out my secret.... I must make him hate it somehow... I must I must I must.....

Today's other duties accomplished by him is another long list, including the making of some potato salad. Oh brother...