Friday, July 30, 2004
Thursday, July 29, 2004
S H O C K I like to talk... but then so do my friends... so it's equal............. anyways... the real reason for the non-writing this evening is that I have this book.. which I really AM NOT enjoying reading.... but I have to finish it... isn't that a law somewhere..??? So on that note... I will find where ever my girl has hidden herself... tuck her in to her very messy girly room..... leave Mr Sportswatcher in the den, and I am sure the boy will make it home... sometime tonight... afterall he is afraid of the dark. <:=] :) ( :>--O<
Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Today, once again lady Pip took the Purple Power out for another spin... first to the park so she could go swimming... and then she pleads with me.. to go the long way home... what ever Pip... and off we go. I'm walking, she's riding. And that was that.... so... I'll see you at home K Ma Ma. Umm, once again... Pip... you are with me... remember... kids stay with adults... hey Pip... did you hear me...Pip.... kids stay with adults.... PIP !!!..... I call out to her as she cruises around the corner, waves.... "I'll see you at home"..... oh well.... I just keep walking along. When I reach the trail... their she is. Bike laying in the dust.. her sitting on a barricade. Well Pip... what happened here... I look.... her knee has been busy bleeding for a while. WE dump a bunch of water on it... she rides home.... where she proceeds to go in the house... clean it out.. find some bandaids.. comes back out... and wants to go riding with her friends. PIP ------ NO !!!!!
Meanwhile...the boy got a book, a funny book, he was happy with his funny book. So happy that he needs to read me all the funny captions. ALL THE TIME. Funny boy reading funny captions... suddenly things are not so funny anymore !!!!
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
I have had a couple more thoughts...
- The kids are going to be pissed tomorrow when I wake them up early, and we make our way to the Town Centre Stadium track where they can watch me walk in circles and "hiss" about being away from their home.
- They are taking this day of "nothing" on the calender a little too seriously.
- My children will never be able to join the swim team, because you have to be their at 0530... yes that's in the morning.... I can just imagine what words they would have for me then.
- I am going to become my own swim team... and I will wear a green suit, kind of a secret blogger code kind of thing... that should be good.
- The boy wanted to know how long "that dish cleaning thing" ran for.... the only reason being that he wanted it for his favourite red cereal bowl. Looks like he wont be eating today.
- My girl has changed from her Cinderella dress into a house marm dress. She won't be going out today....
- Oh, on the weathergirl front... I believe what I am witnessing happening in the skies above me is "SMOG". I would hesitate to guess that's what it is... although I am hardpressed to see it right over my head... even though I know it's there... I usually see the "bulk" of it sitting on the horizon..... I will be making my application to weathergirl school sooner than I thought with that realization...
- I wonder about this Blogger World I have entered into.... did I really have all these thoughts before... and I never wrote them down....and now that I write them.... do people actually read them... and if they do... shouldn't I have made this a little more anonymous?
- Oh, and lastly... I like Michael Smyth... he writes the neatest things about goverment issues....... I would like to thank the Liberal Government for being divided over the issue about whether or not they will build ferries in British Columbia. They are willing to let $500 million dollars "slip" out of the province to be given to Germany or Finland for building ferries for us. Who ever can build them the fastest and the cheapest. Never mind the fact that it will generate 2000 jobs in BC, and result in $75 million dollars in tax revenue given to three levels of government, and other money making spinoffs. Thanks once again for being divided over the issue... I certainly know I would be.
- It's July 27th... and for the first time this month... there isn't something to do...Yae. that won't last long.
- So far this morning the boy has done what he was told....from last night. To sleep in. That boy of mine listens, he did just that.
- I have been (OCDish like) staring at the sky.. I haven't been able to come up with the colour of the clouds that have floated into this hemisphere. Maybe I have become immune to seeing colour... the sky has been blue for so long, and with the constant heat beating down... all I can visualize is the colour blue. Hmmm... if I think hard enough it's like a high cloud yellowy greyish/whitish film that has overtaken us..(kind of like the colour that emerges after washing dishes while camping!).. and somehow the sun is still able to creep through.... there are shadows present....would that be a filtered light Deanna? I can't wait to make it into "Weatherlady School"
- The girl is dressed in a long gown, looking lovely for this morning non-events. She asked if she could have a blond wig.... not sure why... because she owns one... which is attached to her head.
- I am hoping that I will be on time for TKD (Tae Kwon Do) at 6:30 tonight. It could be a tight squeeze though. Ha !!
- The total blog the same as mine has been increased to 5. (thanks to those outthere... sending me info.. you know who you are... someday maybe you can join me at my news station... I'll be the weathergirl... and you can be reporters!!!!)
- I need to go... my home telephone is calling me... (I know this because a computer screen pops up... and it had my phone number attached... and to think I was already typing... I am such a multitasker.. I can type to myself, and talk to myself on the phone at the same time). Wow
Monday, July 26, 2004
So the day started off bumpy.. immediately hungry... which makes her grumpy. Crapola, I think to myself.... nice Monday to me. I feed the beastly little hound her bagels and smoked salmon cream cheese, while she lounged on the green leather couch..... just keep chewing sweet girl.... next on the to-do list was school work. She has a huge stack of "whatever" to work through. So I invite the little beast to the table. Bad move. By this time the boy is already sitting at the table talking numbers.... and she wants to do words. Bad move, because it's a bad mix.... numbers and words.... hmmmmm.... she does a page... with my constant help......I think to myself.. should I just take the pencil and do this for you... but I manage to restrain myself from that parental infraction. I could tell by the way she was leaving about three inches of lead dust all over the page that this mornings school work would be cut short.... five simple questions... and at that she almost snapped her most beautiful barbie pencil in half.... I gave her the evil mother stare-dare.... she settled.... in the den to watch TV. Not what I had hoped... but happy to still be alive.. so there's always a compromise... meanwhile Mr. Numberboy was still doing addition facts... later.... I managed to get her hair washed... because I was still calling her "Missy Lakehead" from being at camp last week. (Our weekend was a bit too busy and she never had the chance to be soaped and lathered and hopefully cleaned). Once again... I came out of it alive. That's two for two. We went to the dentist... to of course get the Pip's teeth filled again. She hissed for a while after we left... that "The Dentist Guy" made her teeth hurt.... but now she was pissed that her nose was itchy.... and she was going to scratch if off....IF I DIDN'T DO SOMETHING RIGHT NOW !!!!!!! Well, Miss Pip... rub your nose... that way it will stay on your face, was the only suggestion I came up with.
We did a couple of errands... the whole while she wandered around with me... can I get something, I want something, can you buy me this,this is what I want, I like this, will you get it, I need it, this is what I want, I will not be quiet until you get me something. I looked her straight in the eye.."Get this.... you get nothing" Don't even try to hiss at me..... the whole while Mr Reading Boy sits, and reads.
The day proceeds... then she decides that its Purple Power Sonic Boom Hour... and wants to start riding her bike. Alright Miss. Out we go.. and I watch her FLY up and down our street on her purple bike. Her pink helmut on crooked, only one pom-pom coming out of her handle bars, in a pink dress and pink sandles, training wheels kicked up high on the sides of the bike, as she hoots and hollers the whole way down the street... MA MA... she screams.... I just love it when I go fast... this is great!!! I think, "I am frightened... I am still alive.... but I am frightened".
Later tonight.... while the boy and I were out walking.... Mr Biker Repair Man came out of retirement to put a new tire on my bike that he had taken off... who knows how long ago. Then I hear her, before I can even see her......"HEY, look at this.. what looks different.... can you see me.... what do you think???.......what am I missing ?????" The girl had her training wheels taken off. Nice. She hasn't used them in how long... but they remained on to what.... continuously bruise and bash her legs. "That's great Pip"... so now that both of the bikes had some minor repairs... we take the bikes out for a quick ride.... she goes belting down the road..... just to have a black cat cross her path... Lucky Girl or what??!!!!
So... we finally made it home... I think we were gone for an hour and a half, and he says to me... "OH, I see Daddy is out front fixing your bike (AAAAhhh dream come true !!!!)....and I am thinking next time we go... we should ride... that way YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO STOP AND SEE ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS THAT YOU BUMP INTO, AND DO ALL KINDS OF TALKING".
I have no freaking idea what him and I talked about for the last few hours... all I know is that he talked... now my next fear is that we talked about something.. that of course he will remember and I clearly wont... and he will recall it and bring to my attention... and I wont have a clue... I think I should be getting worried. He's right... next time we'll ride..... Helmuts and a mouthguard. (For the two of us)
Sunday, July 25, 2004
So, other things that have happened..... tell me if I was too evil. ( I am hoping that I won't have to answer this myself...) My boy was happily watching TV in our room, keeping cool and just being quiet on this Sunday afternoon. His friend knocked on the door, and asked if he could play, sure, and out he goes. Not more than a minute later.. he comes in, in a tizzy and on the verge of tears. I ask him what's wrong. His buddy set him up. .... No sooner did the boy go outside and start talking to his "friend" when the across the road boy come running out.. and beam him in the head with a HUGE water balloon. Nice, real nice. So the TWO friends are still standing outside waiting for my boy... I don't know.. but they get me instead. And I just freak. "What do you two think you are doing???? How would you like it, if the boy came to your door, and thumped you with a water balloon... it would be different if he had been playing with you.... but he wasn't... do you even think this was nice..!!!!????? Apologize now! The one boy starts to smirk... and I hiss at him.... whipe that smile from your face.. what both of you did was cruel, and you should both be ashamed of yourselves... and you guys call yourselves friends of my boy..... well you are not... now get lost !!!! Slam. I can't stand kids.
Oh, we got to go to the Molson Indy... our friends gave us tickets... well I think they were just trying to get rid of us coming over for a BBQ on the Saturday night... it was soooo freaaakiiing HOT down their...... I was practically dead... then I had to whip to go and BUY something to take with us... which I despise doing... because I like to MAKE things when I go to people's houses. Meanwhile.... the husband watered the dogs.. and had a shower himself... as I was running all over town buying drinking and eating things !!!! I was baked.... and not burnt baked... just baked from being out in the roasting heat... but I had fun watching the beautiful loud cars whip past me. Never been before, will never go again, never ever wanted to go, but I was thrilled to be able to go.
Oh, I wanted to write something yesterday.....but it was soooooo freaking hot that it came out something like this.... my fingers were sticking to the keyboard
;alsjar; orit fkvaslkgealkfj d;klj w;t egp]
TRANSLATION: Help I am melting.
Thursday, July 22, 2004
I have to admire those out there (????), who are notably writing all about their political views and theories. I seem to come across them quite frequently. Good for you. In fact today... I found a website that had a template that was the exact same as mine. Mind you this is a borrowed template and all... but there are so many "out there" I rarely see duplicates... except.... the one I read today had a whole political thing on it.... clearly not mine. I am not polilticaly minded... and I wonder what it takes to become one.. except that, that type of info doesn't find its way into my head... I hear about... and then its gone. Oh, and the other thing.. they (the people witht the same template as myself) had a baby today as well!!! Congratulations to all of you, whoever you are.
I dropped the kids off today, and went to go get gas... since the prices have dropped to a mere 81.9 cents a litre.... (but considering I am willing to pay a dollar fifty for a cup of 12oz coffee that gets me where????? It's not so bad). So I drive in, to the self-serve... I am too cheap to have someone pump my gas.. and there's cars and people.... but nobody seems to be moving. Alright, this is interesting. I sit and wait. I begin to doubt where I am and what time zone I've entered into..... and don't do this to a woman that has the whole day to herself...it's only going to make begin to think wild thoughts to write about.... and no sooner did I think it... .then it all began to unfold. Little Lady Slowmotion came out of the Chevron doors, and stopped. Stopped and looked around..... as if she had lost her car at this place...."it's not the mall" I start screaming in my head. She begins to fumble inside her purse, like she had written a note as to where she had left the car. Finally, someone lit a fire under her ass.... and she scurried to... . the car right in front of her. I begin to pull into her spot... but then I have to stop..... because another person emerged.... apparantly she had gone "Chevron Grocery Shopping" for the rest of the freaking month..... I almost got out of my 14 year old SUV and asked if she needed help with her bags. Mr. Coke Delivery Man filed out of the back of his truck.... with his dolly loaded with stuff..... I must have seen him scurry back and forth 6 times while I was filling up.... and I wasn't exactly on empty either !!!! Oh, and then someone starts yelling,...... waving, and yelling and woo-hoo-ing...... I look over.... and this person makes eye contact with me.... I stare for a couple of seconds.... when the fellows "Date for the Day" says something to him.... and he stops. So I am almost finished filling up my 14 year old vehicle.... when I see him. I saw what a fat comic strip person looks like... in real life. I couldn't believe it... I screwed the gas cap back into its spot, then picked up my jaw, and closed my mouth... Cheese and crackers Deanna.... have a little decorum. Uh-uh.
I couldn't help it... I had entered into this twilight zone and this was the final encounter. I draw people that look like this... he even had the walk... little arms and legs swinging away, back and forth, back and forth. On a sincere note.... I would hope I am not truly that evil... and I wished the man that he would find a method for weight loss... and he might have to start making those Pepsi's a Diet Pepsi instead. (I can't help it, perhaps I have a faulty perception meter........ I just write what I see).
I make my way over to the wonderful Town Centre Stadium... with it's amazing rubberized track. I love it. I then begin to walk... in circles and circles for an extended period of time. (It is not a long long time... I have too many things to do... I have no kids with me today, nor do I have to pick them up anytime soon !!!!) Once again, I enter into "A Zone of Extreme Intrigue and Story Gathering Tales". First thing first... it felt like the movie "GroundHog Day"... the same people were there ! I tried to keep the laughter inside my head..... it's not safe to walk around in circles laughing out loud..... people will really stare at you. The same group of boys wandered in, and took their post at the hurdles, the spitting man was still their spitting, the little chinese lady with the purple winter gloves sat crouched NEXT to the bleachers in the shade clapping her hands, ( she did have a choice of many trees that would have provided shade to clap her hands mind you), then there was the "Sheman-manshe?" (This person I am not certain what gender he/she was)... he was still wearing the same clothes as the other day). Then there were the laughing asian ladies up on the stairs... I think they were still laughing from the other day. I'm not even certain what they were doing. One would be up... then down... then they would all be done.. and then the leader would pick-up one ladies leg, and put it down... then they would all clap... and I don't know the rest because I was still walking in circles. Once again I had to withhold laughter..... I considered cruising up the steps and asking them if I could join. My thoughts were that they would start screaming " AAAhhhh white girl... white girl... you get out silly white girl"... I thought best not do that. Then there were the Tai-chi people. They had there music playing, and they were swaying... then they would stop, and talk, then continue.I was happily listening to their peaceful music...when...... the "Quick-Walker" shot past me... got me on the outside rim. Then the bastard lapped me. I didn't even hear him coming. He was wearing the same clothes as he was the other day to. Then Mr Grampa-with-the-baby-stroller came up on the inside.. and passed me. Shit!!!! What am I doing here??? I wondered... the one day that I show up... and do not concentrate on walking "on the line"... is when my life goes crazy !!!! You see, today... I walked between the lines.. meaning that I had a whole lane to myself... normally I concentrate on staying on one line... not sure why.. I just do it.... probably some OCD thing...anyways.... since I was having so much space to walk in today... I had the opportunity to explore strategies and ideas that I never really give issue to. I was enjoying the scenery and the breeze, of course all the people... and asking the big guy upstairs if this was my lifes destiny.... to be walking in circles, only to jump out of that realm when my help was needed. I gave some thought to those questions as I continue to circle.... and finally when I took a good look around.... all of my "groundhog day people" had left....there was me, and a fast runner left on the track... I didn't even notice the people back the gloves, and mats and music and leave.
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN...?
All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?
It took five minutes for the TV warm up?
Nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?
Nobody owned a purebred dog?
When a quarter was a decent allowance?
You'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?
Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?
All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gaspumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn't pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?
Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?
It was considered a great privilege to be taken out todinner at a real restaurant with your parents?
They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed.. and they did?
When a 57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and peoplewent steady?
No one ever asked where the car keys were because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?
Lying on your back in the grass with your friends and saying things like, That cloud looks like...
And playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?
Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?
And with all our progress, don't you just wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace, and share it with the children of today?
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited the student at home? Basically we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.
Send this on to someone who can still remember Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy, Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery, the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows, Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk. As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games, Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool, and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar. Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that"? I am sharing this with you today because it ended with a double dog dare to pass it on. To remember what a double dog dare is, read on. And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between old enough to know better and too young to care.
How many of these do you remember? Candy cigarettes, Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside, Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles, Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes, Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum, Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboardstoppers, Newsreels before the movie, P.F. Fliers, Telephone numbers with a word prefix....(Raymond 4-601). Party lines, Peashooters, Howdy Dowdy, 45 RPM records, Green Stamps, Hi-Fi's, Metal ice cubes trays with levers, Mimeograph paper, Beanie and Cecil, Roller-skate keys, Cork pop guns, Drive ins, Studebakers, Washtub wringers, The Fuller Brush Man, Reel-To-Reel tape recorders, Tinkertoys, Erector Sets, The Fort Apache Play Set, Lincoln Logs, 15 cent McDonald hamburgers, 5 cent packs of baseball cards, with that awful pink slab of bubble gum, Penny candy, 35 cent a gallon gasoline, Jiffy Pop popcorn.
Do you remember a time when...
Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?
Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entireevening?
It wasn't odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?
A foot of snow was a dream come true?
Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?
"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a card game?
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?
If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!! Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their "grown-up" life . . .I double-dog-dare-ya!
Yesterday driving home: Mr. Nine year old thinking boy says to me... "Do you think God is happy"... "oh brother... here it goes.. I think".... "Well", he continues. "Do you think he is at least 50% happy with the world he created?".... oh oh, these out there conversations, always a stumbling block for me.... "Why do you ask?" I ask.... he continues... "You know, with all of the weapons, and warfare, and people dying, and bad things happening in the world, people hurting people, and all of the drugs that are everywhere, people have done this to themselves... and I was just thinking if they could find a place to put all this bad stuff.... then they could rid of it... and the world would be a nice place... and then I think God would be maybe 75% happy with his world again.... what do you think?" Gulp, swallow.... brainstorm... oh were home, whew.
Tuesday, July 20, 2004
Monday, July 19, 2004
Today was the first day of summer camp.... I then have nothing to write about. Pip was busy pulling other peoples chains, and Mr. Sensible was busy talking peoples ears off. I like summer camp.... it's just so good for me. It's almost like school, but we can be late... the bus doesn't pick them up until 9:20. THEN... the better part.... I don't need to collect them until 4:15... that's a whole extra hour of doing things. I like that. I did many things today......
- most importantly... got a Tim Hortons
- went to the bank.....
- found my way to Home Depot....stared at the orchids for a while, made it outside to their garden centre... was disgusted at the crap they had left.... well it was colourful crap, not the stuff you think of, when you read the word
- dropped off film at Costco
- found a track and walked and walked and walked in circles for a large period of time
- then my sister and her two kids spotted me, slowed me down...then I had to leave
- went to the Art 'n' Knapps (garden centre) for new flowers... I wasn't happy with the progress of my huge barrel arrangement... I think the heliotropes had actually shrunk since I put them in the growing spot... or maybe I didn't tell them they were in this spot to grow. Bought some cool pots, and more plants for cheapo dollars !!!!
- met my sister at Costco with her two boys, to give her the eldests birthday pictures... I hope she didn't wait long for me... as it turned out.. I was only able to give her two pictures..... I still had that roll at home ......ooooppppssss !!!!
- I didn't colour my hair.. I should have but I didn't ... oh well... people will just have to get used to the woman with the "rainbow effect" hair colour... not in the exact colours of the rainbow mind you... just shades of brown... starting with lighter at the top, to quite fashionable dark at the ends.... now that is truly attractive... can't wait to go out again tomorrow..... that is priority one for tomorrow morning.... before the drop off with the chicklets
- Made it home... made a conscious effort not to vacuum...I think the hair balls grow while you are out. I am sure when I left the house there weren't that many floating around. ( I have to vacuum every day because of the two evil beasts).
- Dug out planter boxes, repotted junk from the front barrel, fixed the front barrel, cleaned out the unknown zone... (dead space that I use for a planter box garden... not sure why the morons that built our wooden deck before we owned the house...didn't make the side of the space a deck... cheap bastards !!!).
- Was able to make it through the garage and find a ladder, hammer and nails to put back on a piece of the crapola deck roofing that has been off since last year... the King Repair Man thought he was going to redo the whole deck...... idiot !!!!
- Painted the back screen door kick panel.... this, (like the rest of my day) wasn't planned. I was looking at buckets... that I thought were paint... found a colour that I thought was blue.. found a tarp.. and starting painting... hmmmm this is a bluey-smokey grey colour... oh well the King might not notice....
- played the piano... Elton might have a smile on his face if I continue at this pace... "the candle in the wind" is getting a "titch" better sounding.
- posted some pictures....fiddled with my photo editor... checked out how things looks when I decreased the saturation to create a black and white photo. Cool.
- Walked around hammering the heads of nails back into the deck... they seem to creep up after a while... will save some screaming from miss you know who.
- Funs over... left to collect the weary day campers. Brought juice and cookies to charge the missys batteries... because I know she would require some form of refreshment.... and besides it would give her mouth something to do rather than bark out orders at me. They both started fighting... Mr. Sensible was caught being Mr. Idiot... and he didn't like that... so Pip started to tell me his woes.. he didn't like that... they starting fighting.. I started yelling.... Oh, I see everyones back!
- Stopped at the sisters to collect Super Sonic Reading Boys Books
- Took them for a drive... not that they didn't just have a drive... but it was that awful 4:30 hour.. that awful time when it's still ok to find people to play with... anyways.. made it down to Minnekhada Lodge... we sat and watched a bear in the field. Then we drove to the other side of the park.. and in someones sideyard we saw two huge bears cruising around. WOW, three bears in one day....
- Made some hideous chicken surprise for the chicklets... Mr Hate Everything Unless its a Hamburger ate it all up... hmmm... The Pipster on the other hand had some story as to how come she didn't like it.. but then she liked some parts and not others... and oh please, Pip give me your plate.......
- Mr Cool King Dad gave Pip her stuff so she could ride her bike. I was on the phone. (she had been standing in front of me... tapping her feet, and throwing evil stares at me... waiting so she could go out and ride her to-small-for-her-purple-bike, with training wheels still on, but raised to the level of the rear fender to act as a kick stand). Then the screaming Mimi just kept riding up and down our street at full speed. She's not going to have a face left... I just know it. I pumped up her back tire... she loved the extra speed she got from that.... she was as big as a thumb nail... and what's that I see... oh she has fallen... oh thank you she got up. It was a slow ride home. She walked up onto the lawn dropped her bike and her helmut, and demanded her blanket, that she needed to lie down, and where was her cold cloth. She was done. As only Pip would want, King Video Dad put on Santa Claus is Coming to Town... guess who picked it???
- Found my book I am reading.. got distracted by the screen saver.. and here I am.
- Yae, it's only Tuesday.... they will have fun again at camp tomorrow... so will I !
Sunday, July 18, 2004
( oh a side bar from last night...... )....I was here, at my post... and Mr Funnyman comes walking in the kitchen from his friends next door, they had been bouncing on his trampoline... it's about 10:40, "where is everybody?", he asks... "It's just me Mr. Funnyman, all on my lonesome, me, the keyboard and my thoughts" I say. He sits in the kitchen chair and sighs.... then says: (He comes up with some ...hmmm I'll guess southern drawl...) "What about me mama, I'm here with ya... you must'nt forget about me...". I crack up. Nice boy, real nice.........................anyways... back to business................so, the girls home. IMMEDIATELY IT STARTS. "Well you know.. I am board, and I think I am thirsty" she begins.... I look at the clock. Hmmm, she's been home long enough to hug her Super Camper Dad... and look at her room. 2 minutes. Yae. "You go fuss", I say to her... "you go find a friend". Ha, she forgot the drink... I think to myself as she marches across the street to ambush her friend that was locked away in her home. Life is good... until the friend had to go in. Now she's back.. and she's pissed... and guess who she is taking it out on... me. Me, in my garden. I was just happily watering and feeding my flowers. Then SHE arrived. Now she's thirsty and hungry..... and mad. SHIT!!!!! She wants a TOFU milkshake. "Can't you just eat the hamburger that Grama made for you, and I brought home because I knew you would do this????" I asked her. I don't like hamburgers she said. " Freaking Liar" was the first thought running through my head... but me, being the ADULT, I am not allowed to say that to Miss High Maintenance. "I want a TOFU milkshake, as she holds the package in her hand....(this is not safe... ). "Can you ask Daddy to peel back the lid, and you can eat like a pudding.... "No! It's a milkshake or nothing! she yells (you bet it's nothing missy I think). "Pardon me"....(I eye her).. then, in a calmer tone she repeats it. That's when King Camper Super Evil Dad pipes up... Pip, that's enough, bring it here...... but it was too late... she had already tossed the TOFU out across the patio... see that... see that.... I opened it just fine, she states... I didn't want the stuff anyways. "Miss Fusspot... go to your room please" I call from the backyard. "Fine! I was heading there anyways...." as I hear her footsteps march into the distance. Ahh.... she's back, she's back, she's back... I say to myself as I finish watering my odd assortment of flowers. Cicely on the otherhand is having a nice refreshing TOFU break fresh off the deck. Eventually I make my way over with the hose... it was an easy clean up. Great. She's back.. and full of remorse... crap. Miss Blondy is busy bawling. I remind her of her badness. She claims she wasn't. Pardon me, throwing TOFU across the patio is not bad... well it isn't good missy. So then she apologizes, and then states clearly she is thirsty, and that's it. Fine... go get a drink... have some Soya Milk... and so off she went... tear stained.... but a bit remorseful. ( I think). Well, by the time I have made it out front with my watering can and plant food. There's Pip; on the front step eating another (and proudly opened by her) TOFU container... this time in her favourite Barbie bowl. "See what I did", she happily admits. Great... did you get whatever you needed to drink I ask her. "Oh yes, see". (she has the BIGGEST glass possible... full to the brim with Soya Milk). So the young lady (she's 13, and our babysitter) from next door comes over. Pip finds a book then reads to Tina.... and finally, when all is said and done.. I ask Miss Pip "did you finish your TOFU"... "oh no" she says... while I wasn't looking... some ants crawled in it.
Isn't it fun to read about yourself..... and you know it's you, and you don't even read your name S P O O K Y !!!
.... the blogging people should send out notice when it's making changes....(like a flashing little red blotch with a yellow NEW in the middle of it).. I'm pretty new to this... I don't know if you have to have spend a certain amount of time typing with a bad templete to earn rights to get a new and improved model... are these the Magic Rules that people just end up knowing, without anyone saying anything. Speaking of rules....
WE have these two dogs. They're German Shepherds, females, one, we picked and the other picked us. They really hate one another. Really. They like people. (Lucky for them). But... there are so many freaking rules about owning them.... and then of course there are the non-rules, or, shall I put it.. the back up plan rules about owning them.... the first one, "Cicely" named after the fictional town in Alaska from that show "Nothern Exposure", (which I think should have never left the air due to it's innate ability to add quirkiness to your lives at just the right moment !). Then there's L.P. (or Ellpee, since people ask me how to spell her name, and at the risk of sounding like a total creep from the down under... I just spell her name out.... of course the whole time thinking to myself.... OK it's back to kindergarten for you..... ) Anyways, these two beasts have drafted up the most detailed list of do's and don'ts you'd think they were poodles. Ha ha, if they could read, I would be dead. They not only hate each other, they hate poodles, well they hate all of the rest of the four legged world. (We've been trying to keep them away from bears, gorillas, apes and kangaroos... they could have some difficulty with these). You know that saying something like "if one door closes, another one opens"..... I should have made it up, but not for the hopeful opportunistic reasons it was intended for.. but rather to separate our beloved beasts from ripping one anothers throats out. (So far this method has worked) They are very similar to ships that pass in the night.... we open the sliding door, one goes out, as the other comes in... sometimes they bump heads, my heart skips a beat and I wince, I reach forward to give them a little nudge... and all is safe...until next time. LP... the dingbattish one of the two, sometimes forgets that she is not allowed in the yard when Cicely is out there. I was busy outside one day, and out she saunters... with Cicely sitting next to me. unnkg. gulp. I drop what I am doing, walk to the sliding door open it wide, make eye contact with the dingbat and ask her to come. A wrong move on my part would incite Cicely... and she would run over to LP to show her dominence.... and then the fur would be flying. They are very good at both lunging onto one another... and doing some kind of death roll (similar to a crocodile with fur).... this has proven to be a difficult separation attempt. So, that is why we have Babygates. They work, for big dog fights... I have many times just pushed the babygates between their two faces, and separated them... and then when they lunge back for more... there's already that magical door effect... and they go back to their different parts of their world. AAhhh, it's nicely clouding over, and I want to go and work in the yard... so will continue some new rant later today
Saturday, July 17, 2004
I just want to tell my blogging buddy..... and you know who you are..... you blew out my already blown out of porportion Deanna-World to blogger bits !!! Kaboom, bamboozled, blammed, and now, just bummed out. he he he... had ya !!!! I am feeling a little worse for words after a day at work. Say all of that three times quickly, except don't mistakingly put in the word "hard". I didn't have a hard day at work.... I was just their.... doing whatever it is I do. Tonight is a night for another list....once again, I have so many things to say... but no real off-beat stories to flip onto the screen.
- The Pipster called me at work today.... and her little voice (she is only little while on the phone... otherwise she's kind of an amazon girl.... tall, blond, blue- eyed, oh, and at this time of year even with sunscreen...tanned.... what a dog !) anyways, she announces that she really likes her Grama Cuckoo (sound worse in print, but it's all really OK !), so she'd like to stay their tonight. All right Pip... be good I said to her... she dropped the phone and went screaming around the kitchen.... hmm I say to my Mom... you can have her.
- Mr King Husband Thing "Boyfriend Weekend" Man never called to say they made it to their destination..... so if anyone here's from him... could you let me know !!!
- That boy of mine is turning into a mouse, he has red eyes because.... he had a marathon X-Box/Playstation 2 kind of day, with a Birthday Party ( with swimming ) thrown into the middle of the day for diversion.... needless to say he's happy, and I think I see a tail beginning to sprout! ( I have a little dark secret for him tomorrow.... it's right back to the one a hour a day starting tomorrow.... )
- I need a maid. I stopped by my favourite Sushi place.... because that little Sushi man that I dreamed of that would be in my kitchen.... I think he was here... but I think he made Sushi for other people, and he left a big mess here. I don't think that I want to start dreaming of a maid... I think that would be kind of sick.... I will add that to my "eagerly await" list, to fend off any strange dreams !!! ha he he
- I saw one of my friends at work today... and she howled in laughter at me when I told her that I had grounded my sweet blue-eyed son for two weeks. Then her eyes bugged out when I told her that I stuck to my evil wicked ways... and kept him grounded for the whole two weeks. She was frightened to know what it is that he did... and when I told her .... "he didn't listen to me..", she laughed even harder. Now I am left wondering.... am I "Queen Evil" ( I wonder if that's howcome I call our oldest shepherd "Evil Queen"... dogs do take after their master... well if that was the case... then I guess calling Mr. Husband Man's "Boyfriend Weekend" isn't wrong..... is it... ???) .... the pieces of the puzzle are all starting to fall into place..... he he he. !!! only kidding. Anyways, back to the facts.... See, in the end, I kind of thought that the whole grounding thing was really a holiday... for me. (oh, Mr. Blue-eyes was grounded from TV, PS2, and computer). It was very peaceful. For Me. I didn't really see anything wrong with it... but from parents extreme reactions... perhaps I was a eencie bit harsh.... ah, who cares..... I have a sweet boy with blue eyes... that listens, only because he can now hear his name when I call him about 20 times in a row, instead of listening to his computer "rollercoaster tycoon" blabbing away at him.
- The Pip thought she was grounded the other day..I told her she would catch some troubles (like lose the use of the computer... and she loves her Princess crap that she plays) if she misbehaved. (She's a natural when it comes to misbehaving!) I had to go to a periodontist.... so I brought the chicklets with me. They're 7 and 91/2... they are quite capable of sitting, reading a book, and remaining silent for 20 -25 minutes.. without acting like fools. So, I'm in this dentist chair.... and I'm only their for a consult... they want to do "A" gum graft. Now, to me, that means ONE. That's it. Well, apparantley.... "A" doesn't mean ONE anymore!! (Have these people never heard of A-1 before ??) So, I want to know how ONE turns into FOUR. Now the fun part begins...... I can't quite figure out howcome it's going to COST $600.00 to move 4 pieces of gum. That's $600.00 each. Now times it by 4. That's right.... you can do the math. I'm kinda thinkin here something is "amuck"... because you know when you travel;(across provinces that is).. you can pay a return fare.... well of these pieces of "gum" are only going one way.. shouldn't there be a reduction in cost? And besides..... I am supplying my own gum, so that should result in further reductions.... am I right. Wrong. hmmmm ....I am now standing at the reception desk, leaning on the counter, staring at this paper... the whole while, Mr. Responsibility is standing next to me... shaking his head, tapping my shoulder, and pointing at "The Pipster". She is standing in the centre of the reception area... caught in the act of being "My Little Pipster".... she starts to cry. So I say hold it, you can't cry, I'm going to cry.... I leave my paper and go sit down with her. Mr Responsibility informs me of her antics while I was busy having my bank account drained, all the while trying to keep my teeth in my head..... so I say to "Pip", is it true, did you stand in front of the mirror and dance and sing quietly... did you really do all that??? The dam overflows, she turns to jelly and the little Pipster is nodding yes... well, I said, "Did you do a good dance?" She nods again. "Well, good for you Pip, I'm glad that you danced... because good quiet little girls that are politely dancing, and not bothering their brothers are wonderful!!! Mr Responsibility was looking at me, The Pip was looking at me.. and the desk ladies were looking at me. I stood up to collect the "A4" graft statement... and the reception ladies were most impressed with the silent kids that they had. They couldn't believe that the kids sat quietly, they at one point looked up to see if they were still their.... they didn't even see they had a dancing queen underfoot..... My Pip..!. To thank them I took them out for lunch after that... because as I know... the very second you get that girl into the vehicle she's hungry... we listened to her howls of hunger pains the whole way.... even into the restaurant my actress turned dancer was leaning on me..... I got her a drink of milk (to shut the beast up!!!)..... and when her food came.... she sat and coloured her Arthur colouring book... and we boxed her food for home.!!!
- I'll call it a day... I will have to venture out tomorrow to find some human interest stories to fill my head with... and then offer up the points of interest for tomorrows post.
Friday, July 16, 2004
Hey again, what's with all the new fonts.... is it a mileage pay off... if you write over 12,000 words in under 65 days... you get better features.....ooooohhhh, I am in love. OH, I think I am fondling the template... I can add colour, and images... and I don't have to write from left to write... and they have numbered paragraphs...... and the font can be changed....... there really is a God ! I believe... I really believe !!!!! Enough of that crap. However this got here.... oh happy day. Well, here it goes:
- You have to check out this blog.... beFrank..... I think its www.coolshots.blogspot.com. He will instantly become a must read. Anyways, he was planning on doing some reformating... and I (and a bunch of other people) basically begged him not to... if you check out his site you will know why.. how would I write it.... it's just cool. So, on that note.... every body has a say.. and votes do count, so pat yourself on the back if you do it... and remind yourself (if you don't) for next time.
- Look at that... my second thought... coming right at you..... I am worried for the people of North America. It appears to me... (as I was driving home from work today after 3 weeks off from work), that people are spending way tooo tooooo much money on clothes and hairstyles.... but lacking in funds for mirrors. I was frightened by some of the concoctions that people had put together... actually what I really said was... "Holy Shit.... what blind person dressed you this morning". ( Am I safe in writing that... I don't want to offend the "well dressed under-sighted")
- The song of the day (on the piano) is "Midnight Special" found in my Reader's Digest Treasury of Best Loved Songs, ((Note; some of these are not best loved..... I was playing the theme from Love Story the other day"Where Do I Begin"... and Miss Pipster (blond 7 year old) says to me... yuk... is that dying music?))...... somehow a person named "Huddie Ledbetter" AKA "Leadbelly" reshaped this from overhearing folks songs from a Texas prison. I figured that I better give this one a try, since Elton John would still not be impressed with my "Candle in the Wind"..... he's probably burn the sheet music I was playing from.
- King Camper Mr. Husband Man has gone away with all of his BOYFRIENDS this weekend. It's a free weekend to boot. All year long they strip metal, and recycle it for cash.... which they dump into an account... and then for one weekend in the summer they go away.... all expenses paid. I think if they were really kind hearted gentlemen they would fork over the freaking cash and just let the wives go shopping. Maybe then I would quit calling everyone "BOYFRIENDS". Until that happens.... the name remains, as well as the pink lettering !
- I HATE THE WALK IN CLINIC. Both of the chicklets are coming down with colds... they never really have colds that amount to nothing... or that a couple of mega doses of Vitamin C could cure... they always have to get stupid things... things that make me go to the walk-in clinic... because their actual Dr. is always too busy... and, is actually a pain in the ass to drive to. SO.... best alternative is the walk-in clinic. For whatever reason... these guys just bug me. I always feel like a mother that has "Muncheussers", or however we are spelling the word on a Friday night....but on that thought... they 9 1/2 times out of 10 walk out of the clinic with a prescription that will inevedibly cure their ailments. Since I am working all day tomorrow, I am sure Sunday morning we will make our way their. In the meantime... I will send Mr. Funnyboy to the neighbours (first thing in the morning, to play x-box with my friends 4 year old son... so she can sleep in, ---because her husband is away and busy studying to be a "Vancouver Police Man"), and get this... then off to another boys birthday party... that he generally my Mr Funnyboy doesn't even care for. The Girl will go to my parents place for the day... where they have their "New 8-year-old" dog..... and she can drive them crazy with all of her blond Pipster comments....
- My apologies... I had way more to say earlier... but I seemed to have forgotten them. Which is quite sad... considering how important dribble is actually worth these days.
- Over and out for now......
Thursday, July 15, 2004
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
4 QUICK SALE:
7 years old, has blond mop on top, needs a bit of a tune-up
(shifts gears, but kind of slowly;
requires fluid levels to be topped up at regular intervals;
hard on its treads, will need new ones every couple of weeks;
has short periods of complete dysfunction but recovers nicely, nothing to be concerned about.. just hard to deal with)
body is good; a couple of bumps and scrapes,
the most notable mention is the sound, sometimes purrs, sometimes hissing and sputtering.
All this, for a quick sale.... it would look good on you !!!
Don't delay......Rush on over now.....
you will get complimentary 6 pack of fluid of your choice,
AND, a special gadget package to dress up your purchase.
HURRY !!! There is only one "4 QUICK SALE".... make it yours today !!!
I sent this to a friend today... I haven't heard back from her...
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
Monday, July 12, 2004
Cicely’s Vacation Requests
I am otherwise known as the Evil Queen…. He he he…..
I am really a good dog…. I’ve just gone bad….he, he he….
I mostly like people, and I tolerate kids. See my Do’s and Don’ts list that my human friend has come up with…… most of them I will agree to, some of them I am proud of, and the others require no comment.
I like to be petted, a lot. And when you stop… I will paw at you, and probably tell you not to stop.
Give me two scoops around dinner time… I won’t necessarily eat it, but then that will give me something to do later when I pick up a mouthful and run into another room, spit it out, then eat it. This is a great game; it drives the human’s nuts!
I like to talk, you can tell me to do things… and I will almost always give you an answer. I will tell you when I want to go outside, just ask me.
I like my pills with cheese, or sometimes with a cracker… if you have something extra around… because I really like people food…. Although the kitchen staff doesn’t do a very good job of serving it… I especially love watermelon and apples.
If I am just sitting staring into space, I like to be reminded that I have a bunch of toys that need to attended to. Right now I’m in love with the new soccer ball… it builds my jaw muscles… doesn’t do much for cleaning the teeth.. oh well
If you like, I love big rocks. I carry them around; toss them on the ground…. And have quite a bit of fun hissing at the little beasts
I noticed your strawberry plants yesterday…. You may need to stop me from eating them….. As far as I know, I am colour blind…. But I can’t resist the taste.
Remind me to settle down. Sometimes I have just so many things that I am thinking about that I begin to pace… and I need to be reminded to relax, a Queen’s job is never done.
I do fetch. Fetch and return, no thanks, that’s simply too much work.
Ask me to speak, shake a paw, lie down, sit, and rollover.. (the latter only occasionally)
Please DON’T:I do not like to have my tail touched. An adult can touch it… but I will run away if you try!!
I don’t like you to take my toys. They’re mine. I do not share. I never have and never will; even those people that I live with can’t make me. Besides, I will just pick my stuff up and walk away anyways… I will always win.
Blow in my nose…. Those people do it… just to get a rise out of me!
Don’t worry if you do not give me a pill everyday…. Those people do not give one to me every day… only when it looks like I am favouring this little elbow of mine.
Make me race up and down the stairs, I’m not too used to them… and it’ll make my arm sore. I’ll keep that to a minimum thanks…. Do Queens’ even need to exercise????
Don’t worry….I know, I know…. Leave the bees, butterflies and birds alone…. But while I am in control of your yard… I must be diligent in driving them away.
Also, do not worry, I have never bitten a human and I do not growl…but I kind of make some kind of hissing noise when someone tries to take my toys. Usually I have already grabbed my beloved item and ran off anyways.
Don’t worry about trying to get me to stop barking… if you call my name enough times, I might take the time to listen to you and stop. I don’t really bark for no reason.
Worry if you forget to bring me inside, I have on occasion “been forgotten” by the common people inside….. I will wait for you…. As I waited for them….. WHEN THE SUN CAME UP. (Beasts!)
Don’t feel that you need to take me out for a walk. I enjoy dragging my humans on occasion around the neighbourhood…but I do not enjoy idle chit chat with any other four legged “anythings”.
Sunday, July 04, 2004
Saturday, July 03, 2004
Why is it that everytime I add something to my blog, the edges go square?
Why can't I figure out how to add smiley add ons...
I am forced to view my blog with many yawns...
I keep digging for details to make it exciting..
I will not find it with my drool that I call writing.
I view through my travels the exciting finds..
which of course I haven't been able to add to mine.
This makes me crazy..as I continually see my shades of green
I have been able to post a few pictures, which some may have seen.
I want to download images from my Microsoft Word...
I don't think I can... unless some else has otherwise heard
I work in colour... a rainbow of shades as big as the sky...
Which none seem to emerge, as much as I try.
I am tired of this blog... and the limitations before me
Any word from the wise that can be delivered to thee?