My children are what???

I thought I had children... but I do not.... I have two young boxers... a 7 year old with a left hook, and a 9 /12 year old with a right hook. Today they visited unannounced and displayed their fine talents for the nice babysitter girl from next door.... I owe her lots of money.... or a can of pop... some chocolate... how about just a bag of sugar, a big bag of chips... or some gift certificates for a fast food place .....I am going to have to think fast... because she is coming back tomorrow for an even longer day with them..... I hope my children return in time for her to look after them... they quite like her.

So the day started with a .......??

Ma Ma !!!! Ma Ma !!!!! So Missy Lou-who woke up this morning screaming her fool head off ! I enter into the "Pip's Toy Palace Where Every Move Could Be Your Last Move".... she is locked beneath her lavender duvet cover with her face smashed into her pillow... and she is fast asleep. I'm looking at her and she is definitely fast asleep.... all of a sudden her eyes pop open... and she magically bolted out of her bed - BOOM - like a stick of dynamite - and into our bed she goes.... Pip, Pip are you in their.... as she settles in our bed... she barks.... "Put the TV on for me".....No fear, Pip is here. I wasn't quite sure what the whole deal was... but she had been momentarily locked in fright.......too bad she couldn't stay that way the whole day.... the babysitter was coming !

No time to write.... too much to read

I'd love to write an anecdote from today.. but I thought I would give the weary readers some time to breath... besides..... I did the best thing today... I talked to some of my friends on the phone today.. which of course takes up lots of time... because believe it or not
     S H O C K  I like to talk... but then so do my friends... so it's equal............. anyways... the real reason for the non-writing this evening is that I have this book.. which I really AM NOT enjoying reading.... but I have to finish it... isn't that a law somewhere..??? So on that note... I will find where ever my girl has hidden herself... tuck her in to her very messy girly room..... leave Mr Sportswatcher in the den, and I am sure the boy will make it home... sometime tonight... afterall he is afraid of the dark.  <:=]     :)     ( :>--O<

Have a look at this.... it'll be fun !

I got it from a friend of a friend of a friend !!! Thanks Lujza !

Pip and the Purple two-wheeler

This girl of mine now rides two wheels. She has for a while..but the King-dad-bike-guy never took them off. I take them out for a bike ride yesterday, the safety boy brought his water bottle... in case of dehydration issues, it only took him TWENTY MINUTES to fill it up. So, who heard me yelling COOOOMMMMMMEEEEEEEE OOOOOOONNNNNNNNN...  to him? As far as I know here in big BC, especially in little Port Coquitlam... we have very good water pressure....although safety boy can magically change that scenario. WE start to ride... the girl is instantly gone... leaving us in her purple dust... and she's riding and talking.... like turning her head around and talking at myself and Mr Safety... uh Pip... could you just turn around and ride.. I call out to her. We kind of rode forever along the dike.....we were almost at a stopping point, when she decides she's had enough, and turns around to head for home. Say Pip.... who's the adult here....you are supposed to stay with me. She says "No, this is far enough, you are going to drive straight into that bridge over their... so I'm turning around and going back home, besides, I need to get to that secret trail". Luckily I had a treat for Her Royal Beastiness. We head for home... but first we spot a snake.... Mr Safety stays a safe 10 feet away... and begins to tell The Pipster to stay back.... not her... her and her purple roadster ride right up to it. "I love that guy!!! she yells.... "Look how fast he moved... I think I want a snake of my own!!" she says. Mr Safety comes to investigate after the snake is long gone.  WE leave and once again we ride in purple dust. Along comes this hill that leads to the secret trail... so I say to the Pip... slow down... get off y.-----bi-------e.. OKAY...... don't get off you bike... you just keep going girl.... see how fast you can really go BEFORE YOU FLY OFF THAT PURPLE POWER MACHINE OF YOURS !!!! Ya hoo !!!! she starts yelling... " Ma ma... Ma ma'.. did you see how fast I went... I thought you were going to tell me to slow down... but I just wanted to see how fast I could go!" (Yes that's right Pipster... oh little girl with a pleated summer skirt, sandles and a matching spaghetti strap shirt...yes, there would have been nothing left of you..... and definitely a good experiment..... so have I written about my hair colour that says permanent.. with no fading.... well it's not doing what it's supposed to... I am not certain if it has anything to do with the hair colour at all...... or it might have something to do with the Purple Dust Creator.) WE continue on home... the whole while she's clipping along on her "magic purple machine", and Safety Boy is busy hissing about looks at what she's doing.. I can't believe that.... why does she do that.... make her stop that... she's going to hurt herself....she's such an embarassment....please be silent and ride Mr Safety....
Today, once again lady Pip took the Purple Power out for another spin... first to the park so she could go swimming... and then she pleads with me.. to go the long way home... what ever Pip... and off we go. I'm walking, she's riding. And that was that.... so... I'll see you at home K Ma Ma. Umm, once again... Pip... you are with me... remember... kids stay with adults... hey Pip... did you hear me...Pip.... kids stay with adults.... PIP !!!..... I call out to her as she cruises around the corner, waves.... "I'll see you at home"..... oh well.... I just keep walking along. When I reach the trail... their she is. Bike laying in the dust.. her sitting on a barricade. Well Pip... what happened here... I look.... her knee has been busy bleeding for a while. WE dump a bunch of water on it... she rides home.... where she proceeds to go in the house... clean it out.. find some bandaids.. comes back out... and wants to go riding with her friends. PIP ------ NO !!!!!

Can you hear that?

It is the sound of my remote controlled fan whiring away, and the echos of televisions sets. That's it. How does one acquire such a sound..... take your children to the lake where they swim for 3 hours straight in the boiling heat. I think I am going to crown myself !! Too late.... that crowning moment is over... The Pipster has made her way to me......this could be trouble.

It's JAWS !!!!

So, last night I wake the girl from her deep slumber.... that was taking place in our bed. "Come on little girl.... wake up... let's take you back to your bed..... "... with my guidance she starts to move.... I walk her out of our room... and was closing in on her bedroom.... when JAWS attacks. Hey... she's trying to bite me... eeek... the girl was just wandering along in her sleepfilled state when all of a sudden her eyes see my forearm as a midnight snack... and she lunges. Yikes... I remove my limbs from the Miss Great Whites view.. and she carries on into her bed... I had to lift her in... well her and her BRAND NEW too-big-to-be-for-real-blue-and-pink UNICORN. I attempted to buy her an "EDUCATIONAL" item while I was out... but she spotted this beast... and that was it..instantly her COTTON CANDY Unicorn was a need for the day.
 Meanwhile...the boy got a book, a funny book, he was happy with his funny book. So happy that he needs to read me all the funny captions. ALL THE TIME. Funny boy reading funny captions... suddenly things are not so funny anymore !!!!

The Day has been Delayed because...

I have had a couple more thoughts...

1. The kids are going to be pissed tomorrow when I wake them up early, and we make our way to the Town Centre Stadium track where they can watch me walk in circles and "hiss" about being away from their home.
2. They are taking this day of "nothing" on the calender a little too seriously.
3. My children will never be able to join the swim team, because you have to be their at 0530... yes that's in the morning.... I can just imagine what words they would have for me then.
4. I am going to become my own swim team... and I will wear a green suit, kind of a secret blogger code kind of thing... that should be good.
5. The boy wanted to know how long "that dish cleaning thing" ran for.... the only reason being that he wanted it for his favourite red cereal bowl. Looks like he wont be eating today.
6. My girl has changed from her Cinderella dress into a house marm dress. She won't be going out today....
7. Oh, on the weathergirl front... I believe what I am witnessing happening in the skies above me is "SMOG". I would hesitate to guess that's what it is... although I am hardpressed to see it right over my head... even though I know it's there... I usually see the "bulk" of it sitting on the horizon..... I will be making my application to weathergirl school sooner than I thought with that realization...
8. I wonder about this Blogger World I have entered into.... did I really have all these thoughts before... and I never wrote them down....and now that I write them.... do people actually read them... and if they do... shouldn't I have made this a little more anonymous?
9. Oh, and lastly... I like Michael Smyth... he writes the neatest things about goverment issues....... I would like to thank the Liberal Government for being divided over the issue  about whether or not they will build ferries in British Columbia. They are willing to let $500 million dollars "slip" out of the province to be given to Germany or Finland for building ferries for us. Who ever can build them the fastest and the cheapest. Never mind the fact that it will generate 2000 jobs in BC, and result in $75 million dollars in tax revenue given to three levels of government, and other money making spinoffs. Thanks once again for being divided over the issue... I certainly know I would be.

There really is nothing on my calendar???

• It's July 27th... and for the first time this month... there isn't something to do...Yae. that won't last long.
• So far this morning the boy has done what he was told....from last night. To sleep in. That boy of mine listens, he did just that.
• I have been (OCDish like) staring at the sky.. I haven't been able to come up with the colour of the clouds that have floated into this hemisphere. Maybe I have become immune to seeing colour... the sky has been blue for so long, and with the constant heat beating down... all I can visualize is the colour blue. Hmmm... if I think hard enough it's like a high cloud yellowy  greyish/whitish film that has overtaken us..(kind of like the colour that emerges after washing dishes while camping!).. and somehow the sun is still able to creep through.... there are shadows present....would that be a filtered light Deanna? I can't wait to make it into "Weatherlady School"
• The girl is dressed in a long gown, looking lovely for this morning non-events. She asked if she could have a blond wig.... not sure why... because she owns one... which is attached to her head.
• I am hoping that I will be on time for TKD (Tae Kwon Do) at 6:30 tonight. It could be a tight squeeze though. Ha !!
• The total blog the same as mine has been increased to 5. (thanks to those outthere... sending me info.. you know who you are... someday maybe you can join me at my news station... I'll be the  weathergirl... and you can be reporters!!!!)
• I need to go... my home telephone is calling me... (I know this because a computer screen pops up... and it had my phone number attached... and to think I was already typing... I am such a multitasker.. I can type to myself, and talk to myself on the phone at the same time). Wow

Days end, ends with a Post about the Pip

I can't end the day without a thought or two not passed on about the Pip. The Princess Queen Almighty One Herself deserves to be spoken about... I guess.
 So the day started off bumpy.. immediately hungry... which makes her grumpy. Crapola, I think to myself.... nice Monday to me. I feed the beastly little hound her bagels and smoked salmon cream cheese, while she lounged on the green leather couch..... just keep chewing sweet girl.... next on the to-do list was school work. She has a huge stack of "whatever" to work through. So I invite the little beast to the table. Bad move. By this time the boy is already sitting at the table talking numbers.... and she wants to do words. Bad move, because it's a bad mix.... numbers and words.... hmmmmm.... she does a page... with my constant help......I think to myself.. should I just take the pencil and do this for you... but I manage to restrain myself from that parental infraction. I could tell by the way she was leaving about three inches of lead dust all over the page that this mornings school work would be cut short.... five simple questions... and at that she almost snapped her most beautiful barbie pencil in half.... I gave her the evil mother stare-dare.... she settled.... in the den to watch TV. Not what I had hoped... but happy to still be alive.. so there's always a compromise... meanwhile Mr. Numberboy was still doing addition facts... later.... I managed to get her hair washed... because I was still calling her "Missy Lakehead" from being at camp last week. (Our weekend was a bit too busy and she never had the chance to be soaped and lathered and hopefully cleaned). Once again... I came out of it alive. That's two for two. We went to the dentist... to of course get the Pip's teeth filled again. She hissed for a while after we left... that "The Dentist Guy" made her teeth hurt.... but now she was pissed that her nose was itchy.... and she was going to scratch if off....IF I DIDN'T DO SOMETHING RIGHT NOW !!!!!!! Well, Miss Pip... rub your nose... that way it will stay on your face, was the only suggestion I came up with. 
 We did a couple of errands... the whole while she wandered around with me... can I get something, I want something, can you buy me this,this is what I want, I like this, will you get it, I need it, this is what I want, I will not be quiet until you get me something. I looked her straight in the eye.."Get this.... you get nothing" Don't even try to hiss at me..... the whole while Mr Reading Boy sits, and reads.
 The day proceeds... then she decides that its Purple Power Sonic Boom Hour... and wants to start riding her bike. Alright Miss. Out we go.. and I watch her FLY up and down our street on her purple bike. Her pink helmut on crooked, only one pom-pom coming out of her handle bars, in a pink dress and pink sandles, training wheels kicked up high on the sides of the bike, as she hoots and hollers the whole way down the street... MA MA... she screams.... I just love it when I go fast... this is great!!!  I think, "I am frightened... I am still alive.... but I am frightened".
Later tonight.... while the boy and I were out walking.... Mr Biker Repair Man came out of retirement to put a new tire on my bike that he had taken off... who knows how long ago. Then I hear her, before I can even see her......"HEY, look at this.. what looks different.... can you see me.... what do you think???.......what am I missing ?????" The girl had her training wheels taken off. Nice. She hasn't used them in how long... but they remained on to what.... continuously bruise and bash her legs. "That's great Pip"... so now that both of the bikes had some minor repairs... we take the bikes out for a quick ride.... she goes belting down the road..... just to have a black cat cross her path... Lucky Girl or what??!!!!

What did you say to me????

The boy and I went for a walk tonight. He asked me if I had a bike. Yes son, I own a bike, but King Daddy Bike Repair Man needs to do something with it so I can ride. So we'll just walk. The boy was in a walking mood...did I say walking... I think I mispelled... it was more like a talking mood.  I am not certain what moved more... his feet or his face. He never stopped talking, not once.. ever... at all, I can still hear his little voice echoing in my head... even as I sit here madly clicking the keys... he is still talking to me.... and he's in the other room, watching TV. Hmmm.

So... we finally made it home... I think we were gone for an hour and a half, and he says to me... "OH, I see Daddy is out front fixing your bike (AAAAhhh dream come true !!!!)....and I am thinking next time we go... we should ride... that way YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO STOP AND SEE ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS THAT YOU BUMP INTO, AND DO ALL KINDS OF TALKING".

I have no freaking idea what him and I talked about for the last few hours... all I know is that he talked... now my next fear is that we talked about something.. that of course he will remember and I clearly wont... and he will recall it and bring to my attention... and I wont have a clue... I think I should be getting worried. He's right... next time we'll ride..... Helmuts and a mouthguard. (For the two of us)

So Long Suckers !!!!

Score one for the Ant Lady.... that peach coloured sidewalk chalk dust  moat has left those pesky little crawlers squirlling in anticipation....BUT GUESS WHAT.... you're not coming any closer !!! I can hold my head high tonight.... and paste a smile on my face... because I even got my pantry cleaned out to boot !!! oh wait...I should go take a peek ... to see if they are really gone... or just pretending to be gone...they could try that trick as well. Coast is clear. Mission Accomplished.

It's up to FOUR now !!!

I have officially made the count to FOUR. ( I will be my own stats counter) FOUR people with this template !!! Who's going to make the first move to change....??? Or, better than that.... we will be the mover and shakers of this blogger world and BECOME................... The Cult of Greenbloggers.............WE will write to the masses.. and every link we add to our pages.... will be another one of us.. coming to you from another dimension. whew-who..... yae for me... and yae for you! A simple side smile would suffice for now. :) , no, let's make it 2 :) :)
 

The Lady Ant Killer

I hate ants!!! I really, really hate ants. Especially when they start marching through my cupboards. The little super-sonic-strengthed shits. Get out of my house  little ants..... I am off to defend my territory loaded with peppermint extract, cotton balls, my cheese grater and the Pipster's sidewalk chalk. (She doesn't know that I am slowly depleting her colourful world of sidewalk chalk). I am evil.... when it comes to ants! I am going to post a sign.... "No Picnicing Here".... that should work.

Look out it's the Laundry Lady and all her friends...

Many things can happen on a weekend. Like loads of laundry that appear in your laundry room. I have no idea how they make it their but they do... and then the Magic Maid comes along and takes care of it... I wonder who that is??? Then of course there's Gardening Girl that makes her way into the yard in the early AM to water all the flowers, and plants. I get along with her quite nicely ! She's welcome at any time at my house... but then there's Weeding Woman, she's similar to Garden Girl, those two get along famously.. and then there's the Soaker Chick. She generally hangs out in the front yard... soaking all the flowers and such. After spending time in the great outdoors... all the personalilites welcome themselves to the great indoors... and that's when Flora the Folder shows up... she unloads what the Laundry Lady has done.. and folds all of those items. But not to be outdone, Vera VonVacuum stops by for a visit. Once she shows up... then she has a great following that like to hang out with her.... Daisy the Duster, Wilma dafilmer-remover likes to hang out in the bathroom, then there's Lady Laminent-Cleaner that always has to pay a visit with Vera VonVacuum. Now you would think that playing hostess to all of these fine individuals that Cara Foracoffee would pay a visit or Ms. Squarebaker. But no, these fine inidividuals are never to be found.... they are quickly pushed out of the kitchen by Mr. Cleanandtidy. This guy stops by on the weekends only, and hangs around long enough to censor all kitchen activities, and put a stop to any form of clutter creation. Damn that Mr. Clean.

So, other things that have happened..... tell me if I was too evil. ( I am hoping that I won't have to answer this myself...) My boy was happily watching TV in our room, keeping cool and just being quiet on this Sunday afternoon. His friend knocked on the door, and asked if he could play, sure, and out he goes. Not more than a minute later.. he comes in, in a tizzy and on the verge of tears. I ask him what's wrong. His buddy set him up. .... No sooner did the boy go outside and start talking to his "friend" when the across the road boy come running out.. and beam him in the head with a HUGE water balloon. Nice, real nice. So the TWO friends are still standing outside waiting for my boy... I don't know.. but they get me instead. And I just freak. "What do you two think you are doing???? How would you like it, if the boy came to your door, and thumped you with a water balloon... it would be different if he had been playing with you.... but he wasn't... do you even think this was nice..!!!!????? Apologize now! The one boy starts to smirk... and I hiss at him.... whipe that smile from your face.. what both of you did was cruel, and you should both be ashamed of yourselves... and you guys call yourselves friends of my boy..... well you are not... now get lost !!!! Slam. I can't stand kids.

Oh, we got to go to the Molson Indy... our friends gave us tickets... well I think they were just trying to get rid of us coming over for a BBQ on the Saturday night... it was soooo freaaakiiing HOT down their...... I was practically dead... then I had to whip to go and BUY something to take with us... which I despise doing... because I like to MAKE things when I go to people's houses. Meanwhile.... the husband watered the dogs.. and had a shower himself... as I was running all over town buying drinking and eating things !!!! I was baked.... and not burnt baked... just baked from being out in the roasting heat... but I had fun watching the beautiful loud cars whip past me. Never been before, will never go again, never ever wanted to go, but I was thrilled to be able to go.

Oh, I wanted to write something yesterday.....but it was soooooo freaking hot that it came out something like this....  my fingers were sticking to the keyboard

  ;alsjar; orit fkvaslkgealkfj d;klj w;t egp] 
       TRANSLATION: Help I am melting.

The Day the Gas Station Stood Still

Fourth day of camp for the kids... fourth day of freedom for me. Yae. Exept that leaves me with time, time to find "things" to fill my blank canvas with... time for me to connect thoughts and ideas in my head.... this is just not safe. First I have to write:

I have to admire those out there (????), who are notably writing all about their political views and theories. I seem to come across them quite frequently.  Good for you. In fact today... I found a website that had a template that was the exact same as mine. Mind you this is a borrowed template and all... but there are so many "out there" I rarely see duplicates... except.... the one I read today had a whole political thing on it.... clearly not mine. I am not polilticaly minded... and I wonder what it takes to become one.. except that, that type of info doesn't find its way into my head... I hear about... and then its gone. Oh, and the other thing.. they (the people witht the same template as myself) had a baby today as well!!! Congratulations to all of you, whoever you are.

I dropped the kids off today, and went to go get gas... since the prices have dropped to a mere 81.9 cents a litre.... (but considering I am willing to pay a dollar fifty for a cup of 12oz coffee that gets me where????? It's not so bad). So I drive in, to the self-serve... I am too cheap to have someone pump my gas.. and there's cars and people.... but nobody seems to be moving. Alright, this is interesting.  I sit and wait. I begin to doubt where I am and what time zone I've entered into..... and don't do this to a woman that has the whole day to herself...it's only going to make begin to think wild thoughts to write about.... and no sooner did I think it... .then it all began to unfold. Little Lady Slowmotion came out of the Chevron doors, and stopped. Stopped and looked around..... as if she had lost her car at this place...."it's not the mall" I start screaming in my head. She begins to fumble inside her purse, like she had written a note as to where she had left the car. Finally, someone lit a fire under her ass.... and she scurried to... . the car right in front of her. I begin to pull into her spot... but then I have to stop..... because another person emerged.... apparantly she had gone "Chevron Grocery Shopping" for the rest of the freaking month..... I almost got out of my 14 year old SUV and asked if she needed help with her bags. Mr. Coke Delivery Man filed out of the back of his truck.... with his dolly loaded with stuff..... I must have seen him scurry back and forth 6 times while I was filling up.... and I wasn't exactly on empty either !!!! Oh, and then someone starts yelling,...... waving, and yelling and woo-hoo-ing...... I look over.... and this person makes eye contact with me.... I stare for a couple of seconds.... when the fellows "Date for the Day" says something to him.... and he stops. So I am almost finished filling up my 14 year old vehicle.... when I see him. I saw what a fat comic strip person looks like... in real life. I couldn't believe it... I screwed the gas cap back into its spot, then picked up my jaw, and closed my mouth... Cheese and crackers Deanna.... have a little decorum. Uh-uh.
I couldn't help it... I had entered into this twilight zone and this was the final encounter.  I draw people that look like this... he even had the walk... little arms and legs swinging away, back and forth, back and forth. On a sincere note.... I would hope I am not truly that evil... and I wished the man that he would find a method for weight loss... and he might have to start making those Pepsi's a Diet Pepsi instead. (I can't help it, perhaps I have a faulty perception meter........ I just write what I see).

I make my way over to the wonderful Town Centre Stadium... with it's amazing rubberized track. I love it. I then begin to walk... in circles and circles for an extended period of time. (It is not a long long time... I have too many things to do... I have no kids with me today, nor do I have to pick them up anytime soon !!!!) Once again,  I enter into "A Zone of Extreme Intrigue and Story Gathering Tales". First thing first... it felt like the movie "GroundHog Day"... the same people were there ! I tried to keep the laughter inside my head..... it's not safe to walk around in circles laughing out loud..... people will really stare at you. The same group of boys wandered in, and took their post at the hurdles, the spitting man was still their spitting, the little chinese lady with the purple winter gloves sat crouched NEXT to the bleachers in the shade clapping her hands, ( she did have a choice of many trees  that would have provided shade to clap her hands mind you), then there was the "Sheman-manshe?" (This person I am not certain what gender he/she was)... he was still wearing the same clothes as the other day).  Then there were the laughing asian ladies up on the stairs... I think they were still laughing from the other day. I'm not even certain what they were doing. One would be up... then down... then they would all be done.. and then the leader would pick-up one ladies leg, and put it down... then they would all clap... and I don't know the rest because I was still walking in circles. Once again I had to withhold laughter..... I considered cruising up the steps and asking them if I could join. My thoughts were that they would start screaming " AAAhhhh white girl... white girl... you get out silly white girl"... I thought best not do that. Then there were the Tai-chi people. They had there music playing, and they were swaying... then they would stop, and talk, then continue.I was happily listening to their peaceful music...when...... the "Quick-Walker" shot past me... got me on the outside rim. Then the bastard lapped me.  I didn't even hear him coming. He was wearing the same clothes as he was the other day to.  Then Mr Grampa-with-the-baby-stroller came up on the inside.. and passed me. Shit!!!! What am I doing here??? I wondered... the one day that I show up... and do not concentrate on walking "on the line"... is when my life goes crazy !!!! You see, today... I walked between the lines.. meaning that I had a whole lane to myself... normally I concentrate on staying on one line... not sure why.. I just do it.... probably some OCD thing...anyways.... since I was having so much space to walk in today... I had the opportunity to explore strategies and ideas that I never really give issue to. I was enjoying the scenery and the breeze, of course all the people... and asking the big guy upstairs if this was my lifes destiny.... to be walking in circles, only to jump out of that realm when my help was needed. I gave some thought to those questions as I continue to circle.... and finally when I took a good look around....  all of my "groundhog day people" had left....there was me, and a fast runner left on the track... I didn't even notice the people back the gloves, and mats and music and leave.

Pardon the Post....but it will be good for your brain.

Trust me... for those that are "age-worthy", the comments/memories listed below will be good for you. Really.  Take some time to read it.. it is a bit lengthy, but it will spur up some memories of long ago... let that brain have a work out...... challenge it into remembering happenings from your past. I do remember some of these,  and some of them (I am glad to say) I am too young to know about... all the same... as a parent, it's interesting to have a look into the past and see how other times were.... enjoy....oh... and thanks to whoever thought this up!

DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN...? 
All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?
It took five minutes for the TV warm up?
Nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?
Nobody owned a purebred dog?
When a quarter was a decent allowance?
You'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?
Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?
All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gaspumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn't pay for air?  And, you got trading stamps to boot?
Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?
It was considered a great privilege to be taken out todinner at a real restaurant with your parents?
They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed..  and they did?
When a 57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and peoplewent steady?
No one ever asked where the car keys were because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?
Lying on your back in the grass with your friends and saying things like, That cloud looks like...
And playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game? 
Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?
And with all our progress, don't you just wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace, and share it with the children of today?
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited the student at home? Basically we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!             But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.
Send this on to someone who can still remember Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy, Howdy Dowdy and the Peanut Gallery, the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows,             Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk. As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games, Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool, and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar. Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that"? I am sharing this with you today because it ended with a double dog dare to pass it on. To remember what a double dog dare is, read on.  And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between           old enough to know better and too young to care.
 How many of these do you remember? Candy cigarettes, Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside, Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles, Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes, Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum, Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboardstoppers, Newsreels before the movie,  P.F. Fliers, Telephone numbers with a word prefix....(Raymond 4-601).  Party lines, Peashooters, Howdy Dowdy, 45 RPM records, Green Stamps,  Hi-Fi's, Metal ice cubes trays with levers, Mimeograph paper, Beanie and Cecil, Roller-skate keys, Cork pop guns, Drive ins, Studebakers, Washtub wringers, The Fuller Brush Man, Reel-To-Reel tape recorders, Tinkertoys, Erector Sets, The Fort Apache Play Set, Lincoln Logs, 15 cent McDonald hamburgers, 5 cent packs of baseball cards, with that awful pink slab of bubble gum,  Penny candy, 35 cent a gallon gasoline, Jiffy Pop popcorn.    
        Do you remember a time when... 
 
Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?
Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entireevening?
It wasn't odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?
A foot of snow was a dream come true?
Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?
"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles? 
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a card game?
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?
If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!  Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their "grown-up" life . . .I double-dog-dare-ya!

in a hurry, in a hurry

I don't have much time... on the way to summer camp... but I can't help myself...

Yesterday driving home: Mr. Nine year old thinking boy says to me... "Do you think God is happy"... "oh brother... here it goes.. I think".... "Well", he continues. "Do you think he is at least 50% happy with the world he created?"....  oh oh, these out there conversations, always a stumbling block for me.... "Why do you ask?" I ask.... he continues... "You know, with all of the weapons, and warfare, and people dying, and bad things happening in the world, people hurting people,  and all of the drugs that are everywhere, people have done this to themselves... and I was just thinking if they could find a place to put all this bad stuff.... then they could rid of it... and the world would be a nice place... and then I think God would be maybe 75% happy with his world again.... what do you think?" Gulp, swallow.... brainstorm... oh were home, whew.

A thinker and a comedian... it doesn't matter what colour I change him into.

Ellpee waiting to go for a ride, comfort level-high, worry level-at the crest of the moon.