More water...

Friday night is pool night for the chicklets... pool as in swimming. Lots and lots of swimming. The kind of swimming where my eyes sting from remaining at the pool for close to three hours. I have had great thoughts about entering the pool myself, and swimming laps... but then I would have to compete for space in a lane.. and then risk getting jumped on by the youngish kids that hang around the pool on Friday evenings. It's safer to find a spot and sit and watch the lessons unfold... and the looks on the instructors faces as the people do their lessons. I wish I could see the look on my face when I watch them do their lessons... it's so not pretty.
On a night where people everywhere are dressing up and heading out to events all over the place... I have staked a spot ... right here. Me and my drink for the night... it's very special to me this night.. tonight is the night where I treat myself to a crystal cold clear jug of tapwater. Yes, it's hard to believe that it's crystal, cold and clear and comes from the tap... but that's as exciting as it's going to get this night. Life in the fast lane.. I can hardly keep up.

More scarey things...

I was waiting for the boy to be done his halloween party... so I started looking at the schools textbooks, which were in the bookcase behind me. Remember Dick and Jane, they were still on the shelf. I also found a text book from 1962, and the pictures even found a spot in my brain... I don't remember the title now. I found the same science books that we used in school... (I have had a couple of reunions since graduating).....I am frightened... I am old, and I am reliving past life experiences....let the hallucinations begin.

I had a fight with the car wash

It's always good to spend time at the car wash by yourself. That way when the swearing gets louder, it's only you and the power washer. Does everybody get hit in the face with the connecting brush? Then there was the constant banging of the overhead power washes cord against my white fourteen year old SUV. That drove me nuts... so I looked around then yelled at the hose. Stop making all that freaking noise!!! Oh, and the hilight was where it (automated token machine) told me that you could stop the process... and you would still have time on the clock.... that wouldn't be the case for me. I put it to stop... and stop it did... and it never came back on... so I had to go and buy another token. It's a good thing it's raining out now, and I just drove up the backroad which turns into dirt a portion of the way to get to the back entrance of the park... just to satisfy my curiousity about seeing any bears. None... but I did see a buck and two does... that was cool.
OH.... I was at the stupid store earlier today... buying "The neutralizers" of partyfood... BUGLES... and... when I was at the till, the young fellow with the long ponytail, and slim hands asked if I would like a bag.. I said yes please. When I walked around the side of the till to put the bags of bugles into another bag I asked "Did you get that bag".. to Mr Youngtill..... "what's the magic word he says to me"...."OH, you didn't hear the question I asked" I said..... "DID YOU GET THE BAG?, it's a question for you, there is no response required until YOU answer my question..... ".... he looks at me puzzled. "THANKS" I say to him... I'm a mother... I don't need you to give me manners in being polite. Freak.
I think what's really got me going here is the fact that yesterday... something happened at school for my boy. Which completely pissed me off...something that I spoke to the teacher about weeks and weeks ago, something that I tried to circumvent.... and it all unfolded yesterday... and it's still lingering about today. If it wasn't screaming down with rain I would go rake the leaves on the front lawn, that would make me less crazy. At least I think it would make me less crazy.

What's wrong with that?

Can you really give out the wrong candy on Halloween??? I was pondering this thought while I walked through Costco yesterday. I put in and took out at least ten items for the Halloween event. Really. I just couldn't make up my mind what was the thing that I would want to see most in my loot bag... if I was going out trick or treating that is. I finally decided on Wagonwheels. That would put a smile on my face if I would have one put in my bag.

Speaking of smiling faces... I turned some poor unsuspecting costco shopper ladies smile upside down the other day when she took a wrong turn in the checkout isle. That is the lack of turning that she did not make. She was moving along side of the granola bar section, which I thought she was going to purchase. I cruised up to the checkout counter in an angular fashion. I did not deek out the parallel granola bar lady, and cut her off. But, according to her, I did. Because it was just then that she decided to make a sharp 90 degree turn into the checkout line... which was the till about 15 feet away from her cart. In the meantime, I had made it to the checkout line before her... clearly a case of "you cruise and you will lose".... not only do my thoughts confuse me.. so do people.

When does someone know?

Now that I am unstuck by the blogger-gods, I have had a thought. I try not to come up with too many at a time... they confuse me.

I wrote the other day about "doileys", as a figure of speech. The big question that has me glazed over in thought at the moment is; at what point in your life do you become acquainted with doileys? When is it acceptable to start setting out doileys in your home? Do you have to be a certain age? What if your furniture doesn't match.....but you just start setting them out anyways... ? Do you need to launder the doileys all at the same time so the space doesn't become unbalanced, and all hell breaks loose. Wait a minute, hell is always loose in this home.. anyways, I am confused by this.

I know for certain that when I was growing up we didn't have doileys. Common sense tells me of course that my mother was way too bright to set them out... because my brother would have pulled all of them off their resting spots and hid them underneath the couch, that is all clear to me. But she has doileys now... and I am not clear on their date of arrival into the homeland. I am worried... does that mean that one day they will just spring up un-announced in my home... and then I will be a doiley-dweller because the doiley genes have been passed on to me? I want to know how I walked along so blindly, not noticing laced objects decorating the table tops....what I really want to know is ... did I give my sister money to be a part of a doiley gift-giving? ( She always gift - shops... and then adds the ... want to chip in....)

This of course is a lead up to the next big step.... at what point will I want to put on a starched tablecloth onto my kitchen table.... and have sensible seasonal centrepieces... I NEED TO KNOW THIS !!!!

Looking for some autumn colours. 

Creeping along the field with her babies 

Visiting close to our house. 

Breakthrough...

It is a beautiful fall day outside... I should be finishing up the winterizing chores. But there are so many ghosts hanging around and signs saying to "beware" that I am remaining indoors... locked inside with my vacuum, Muphy's Oil Soap, Mr Clean, Laundry Detergent, Rubber Gloves, an empty coffee pot, Fabric Softener, day old sushi, and music coming from the stereo ... that is making me feel old.... I just heard the song titled "sanctify yourself"....and the artist would be...? See what I mean... I'm a little old lady keeping her little space all squeaky clean and doileed up!! I even vacuumed the dogs... yes, I say both dogs...the oldest likes to be vacuumed... she tends to walk a lot as I vacuum her.. so she is a challenge... and the youngest silliest and most fraidy cat-dog ever let me vacuum her. Which is a far cry from her racing away from the whining red machine a number of years back. Simple minds. Name of the artist, not a description of me!

I think the girl has it....

One last thought.. as I move on to finding the end of the internet. I have a funny boy... he has a very dry odd funny sense of humour... he just has it. But... somehow his sister, The Pipster has found herself a couple of funny bones, in fact I think she has stolen his. This girl and her antics and her words are worth noting. The girl is funny. And not just a blond girl funny. If only I could keep up with her repetoire of words that she uses to describe her escapades and predicaments. I think I'll start calling them "Pippisms"....

The Boy and the Beast.

Boy, it's time for bed... please take your oldest evilest beast of a dog with you. Please. I say that with a grin and a growl, and kind of a grind (of the teeth). I am trying to be kind.

I have to admit the nice part about the above scenario is the end result. My hair is presently straight, that does not happen much, well, ever. I must go immediately to bed... so that it will be tomorrow already... and I will be the mother with the fresh straight look... not the wild haired red-lipped bad wind tunnel effect woman that I am usually viewed as.

Afraid to look....

I am afraid to look at my children. They are scarey little beasts... and somedays this happens without costumes.... these days mind you they are sporting masks and witch hats enough to haunt even the sweetest of dreams. I can't wait until they get loaded with a bucket of candy... and those beastly children will be in true form.. yes, can't wait. Mr. Cleanandtidy scared up the house... so now it's rather spooked too. The girl is frightened of her glowing green skeleton lights that the neighbour lady gave her. The boy is frightened of his alien that is looking out his window. What he doesn't know is that he is the only alien living here... we just haven't told him yet. The real scare of the night crawled out from behind his garbage basket.. in the form of a spider.

The boy is currently practicing his piano... and right now he has turned it to the sound effect of a vibraphone... which is kind of cool.... kind of the sound that you would here from a street musician. "Home on the Range"... fifty times over.... but I am not really counting.

Well hello there ....

Mr Cleanandtidy nicely tidied up the mess in the sink. It was not a big mess... but a little mess all the same. He also brought home a little four pack of my favourites, in fact something that I have not had in quite a while... Smirnoff Ice, for those further out... it's a vodka mixed drink... devine. So much so that I am staring at the empty bottle and not believing that I have already downed it. Just like the bottle of water that I had earlier.. one gulp and its gone. Except now, my fingers are warm.. and that's a good thing.

We all survived the skytrain, science world and three hours at the pool. I was able to throw in the boys sheets and comforters at some point today... and make an outside bed for the 11 year old evilest of queens, because it was pouring rain out... and I didn't want to leave her inside.

So now that its ten oclock at night.. there has to be something on TV.. something.......I can't read my library book... it's was written for people that reside in coffins... it's completley a dead read. I will not do that torturous task again....

If we don't return... this is where we went

It's a Pro-D day for the chicklets. Today will be an interesting day. I have decided that... so that it shall be. WE are going to venture to science world in the next while....but right now the girl is happily sorting her sparkle gel pens, and will be crazy upon knowing this... I will wait to tell her... I will wait until she is done organizing... at least that way she will clean up her mess. The sad news is... I thought I had a coupon out of the entertainment book for this great SPOT. Everything else in Vancouver is willing to put in a coupon of some chincy form... so that tells you where the marketing strategy is... "don't give them break... because they will still come".... sounds very similar to "The Build A Bear" empire... but don't let me start on that.... in fact I will "lift" my notes from Lujza's place on that very thought... not right now mind you. The girl has started her day nutritionally sound... she found a donut from last nights treats, sugar keeps her at peace. So I will have to supplement her foraging with something more responsible along the way. The boy on the otherhand had his standard cheerios, which every morning he asks me to fix. He still doesn't quite get that I am the mother... not his friend the butler, or the cheery maid. It's all a process in learning... one day he may figure it out... probably the day he moves out, and hires his own maid. The evilest oldest of queens is leaning on me. So I will just keep typing until she moves on... she's old... so she may forget why she even was leaning on me and carry on. I am worried... I have to go wash my hair... and going on what I wrote from two days ago.. I can't have that happen again... I will go to great lengths to appear on the normalish side while I am out... although we are going to take the skytrain downtown... and it's raining. This should all be interesting. ... I will tread lightly.

The day my hair grew bigger

Some days can be very frightening for myself. It all came down to about four thirty yesterday afternoon. My friend came to pick up her daughter, and then we were heading out for... you guessed it... gymnastics. I whipped my hairband off of my head... and that is when it all sprung loose. Even my friend, who I might say has a large amount of decorum... burst into laughter. My hair had gained about 3 inches of pure frizz.....you see it all started earlier in the day....

First wrong move:With freshly dry hair we had our walk to school, in our moist autumn weather.
Second wrong move: Talked to a friend outside of her house... and laughed about our husbands. (that chatter wasn't the wrong move.. it was the bobbling of my head that contributed to this fine mess I was in)
Third wrong move: Arrived a little behind schedule for a long time visit at Lujza's house, so instantly there are demerits for lateness and the punishment is an increase in frizzability.
Fourth wrong move: Laughing for a couple of hours too too long increased the volume of the hair mass.
Fifth wrong move: Drove up to sisters house to watch the girl garden. This is real live gardening at its finest. Much laughter created here. I think the fizz from drinking the diet orange crush added more fuzz to the already really bad hair day that I guess I was having.
Sixth wrong move: Don't try this at home.... marched out to the front portion of the garden and began my own method in madness clean sweep of summer garden materials. The movement of back and forth and up and down, put the head of hair over the edge... it was flying in all directions.
Seventh wrong move: Walked quickly to school to get the kids. I should just wear a sign, I am not crazy, just my hair is. It was big hair, big bad hair. And I took it to school. I still had my lipstick on, so that was an indication that I haven't completely lost it.....unless I start wearing frosted whitesh colours... then someone can hit me.
Eight wrong move: Peered in the window at school, scared myself....
Ninth wrong move: Cleaned the bathroom after we got home... the chemicals were attracted to the wild fray floating around the bathroom.
Finally: My friend came over to pick up her daughter... we went through the number of bottles of antifrizz hair goup.... all of them 3/4's empty... and none of them had been used today. The hair rested high on my head, laughter poured from her, I had to leave to be in a public place, and sit with people that I will never talk to, or ever know..... something had to be done... fast. Then... out came the spray....

Driving between the leaves.

Autumn can be a treacherous time of year for those car loving individuals. As the fall winds come and go they catch the falling leaves and scatter them gently across the roadways, leaving the operator of the vehicle wondering if they should swerve to miss a dead leaf, or a dead animal. That's how the leaves appear to me, around these parts that is.

I'm on the hunt...

It's hunting season, and I am all for that !!! I am going to venture into the deepest and busiest places to locate my prey. I will not come home empty handed. I am not certain how many miles I will have to travel... but it will be well worth it in the end. We will not go without this winter. That's right... instant images from the digital camera that I will be purchasing after I hunt down the most reasonably priced product out there....

JUST DOUBLE CHECKING HERE...

If I wasn't quite certain earlier... I am quite certain now. The boy is still terrified silly of the dark. How do I know this for certain..... we went to a Hay Maze at the local nursery after school today. It was daylight hours when we went I will add. The beastly young bossy fellow hid behind me through part of the maze, all the while directing me where to lead him. After a short while of being completely lost in the darkness we found our way out. I walked, he fled. I think I saw a hint of a spark on his heels mind you. Fortunately for him a fellow parent had a mining light which the boy graciously accepted, as well as the parents 4 year old daughter... which he now led around in the well lit safe hay maze.

Who's child is this?

The boy had a friend who moved away. She fed him... a lot.... the boy misses her. This is his email that he sent her.... I am not sure who he takes after. You can point fingers if you like.

Hi Brittani

thanks for the e mail I read it, my mom got rid of it, and I forgot some of the questions. but these are some question's I do remember. I hope it's all of them. our principal this year is Mr. pattison he is super nice. my teacher's this year are Mrs. Hamilton and Mrs. Huliganga hul-li-ganga that's how you pronounce it. my mom calls her Mrs. Hooligan for some reason I don't know why but it's funny to call a teacher a hooligan I'm the only hooligan around here. or king comedy for short. and Mrs. Hamilton she always sounds like she's over the edge with all of us. she is pretty loud, let's face it she's super loud, she's a yelling machine with that woman there is no saying, "sorry I didn't hear you to her" lets face it, it's pretty much impossible to say that to her. well yeah that's pretty much it about my teachers this year. hey have you gotten any new games I have I can't remember if it's one or two let me go check
sorry about the long wait yep it was one or was it sorry but I have to go check again be right back

sorry about the even longer wait it was only one game I was thinking about the game I rented yea the games called whirl tour it is such a cool scooter game and when you hit innocent bystander's they say stuff like what the devil and why you little. anyways if you like game cheating take my advice go to www.ign.com they have game cheats,codes,walkathon's,screenshots,reviews you name it all for a ps2 a xbox a pc a gamecube you name it all there on your computer screen. so go ahead be free cheat away well anyway that's all for now see ya later bye get lost go away adios amigo's how do you get rid of this darn e mail thing arg!
your friend







PS{I've beaten jak and daxter
5 times how many times have
have you beaten it tell me}

Ring ring

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring...... yes people that's right, you know who you are.. you have a phone, now answer. I don't care if you are not home.... the calls that come from me should be answered, promptly and in person.

This is just a little exerpt of "the willer" being without radar systems... and the thought process of what I was thinking as I was trying to get a hold of my mom and my sister... now that I have written it should happen...because if it doesn't.... someone's gonna freak. NOW. Must go... make a couple of calls now.