If I could only...

Make it to the fast lane I would.

Well, two weeks worth of waiting .. And this is what I have accomplished ...

After speaking with Road Safety BC I was informed that it would take an andditional FOUR months to process my application post driving assessment. Four FUCKING months, yes you read that right. After the first 4 1/2 FUCKING months it took for the bastards to "assess" the driver license status in the first place.

I received a letter on February 19th (that had been dated Feb 5), that stated that they had funded me for a driving assessment, as long as it was completed 60 days within the original date of the letter.  Cool, thank you VERY MUCH, that's only $1200.00 dollars saved! ... But of course ....  Kabang, the little tiny problem of the little tiny wound ... That needed a VAC. The VAC was on and off again in 5 days, which helped the hurry up and heal already by months upon months. After it had been removed, I called the driving assessment location, and arranged for the first available appointment ... March 16th ... Phew ... Under the 60 day mark, however 6 weeks past the original letter dated Feb 5.

March 16th arrives with much fanfare and memories ... A massive windstorm, traffic delays, & power outages ... Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME  .... The OT indicated to me that she would send the assessment out the following week, on Monday orTuesday .. (My brain silently exploded as to WHY she couldn't just send it out the following day ... ), with people comes PAPERwork ...

I called the driving assessment place this past Friday. I was informed that the paperwork was not processed to Road Safety BC only this past week ... (A FULL week after what the OT had stated). Not a big deal right ...... You are so FUCKING wrong ... !!!! GET this ... It takes 7-10 working days for the assessments to even be processed as "received" ... Which means that they attach it to your file. That means exactly that ... They have only "received" it, not that they are processing it. So a week, delay is a really really really BIG deal ... As the applications are processed in the order to which they are received ... So delaying the "sending of the file" has a huge impact ... Especially being on the receiving end of all this.

Hence my gasping for breath on the phone the other day when I was now told it would be approximately four months before I could even see the light of the day with seeing my drivers license  amended.

Are you fucking fucking fucking fucking for real ??? I SCREAMED in my brain ... However; shockingly amazingly miraculously I remain composed and polite and widely kind after been on the receiving end of that blow. The person on the other end of the phone told me that I was the nicest person she had spoke to on the phone the whole day ... It was 3:25 in the afternoon ....

So on that end, it renewed my hatred for the human population behaving insanely cruel to people just trying to do their jobs, I have even a more impassioned hatred for the government and their underfunding of departments where people like me are caught up in a process of paperwork. HUGE HATRED !!!! But I guess you would not have gotten that from this "lightly" written assignment of formuated words ...

How does one recover from this .... YOU FUCKING REFRAME YOUR THINKING.

Currently I am missing my right leg .... IF I were to have waited until I got my "right" leg back to drive with ... Well, then I am still many months away from "walking" on this new leg, let alone driving with it ... And THAT'S how you reframe a MAJOR time shift .... I will drive once my new leg is restored, it is now just THAT simple.

That's the MANTRA ..... If I could only .... Make it to the fast lane ... I would simply say it faster !

In other things .....the game changer might have occurred ... That master musician son of mine might have probably made the best move of his life ... Booked a flight to Toronto ... Playing at Canada Music Week, quit his job .. 

Undertakings 101

And here we have it... Some stuff, or undertakings as you will:

The face clothes in my home keep disappearing ... I haven't quite figured out to what level of hell they find themselves in ... But alas I have taken it upon myself to recreate what I have, and yet has gone missing. Currently am in love with the cast on stitch, as it will match the cast off stitch ... My little complaint about knitting ... Thank you Pinterest for all your smartness !!

This is the gazillion worth of hours of 'the tam' that I built for my mom. It was a delightful weight upon her head ... Just enough to cover her hair, and yet not too heavy to proclaim ... "Bad hair day, look out!" I am most pleased with how it turned out ... I will be re-doing this pattern in turquoise .. For ME ! I was quite fortunate to have a season of house of cards to watch while knitting ... I'm hoping I could get so lucky on my next attempt!

In other things ... In larger under takings that might lead me to moving more than all the sitting that is happening from the above .... I saw the surgeon. I will hope that all her prodding the leg will not incense the living shit out of it .. As that happened to me in January ... The Rehab Doc upset the little wound and it lead to a breakdown in it's happy state ... Which has set me back to this ... So now, after the surgeon has touched it .. I will HOPE that the little tiny spot has had time to KNIT itself back together, and will not mind all the pushing and shoving that she instilled upon it yesterday. It has TWO weeks to sort itself out. I think it will ... It has to, otherwise the alternative is going to set me back months, on top of the months that this has set me back .. Except .. Who's counting ... ??

The boy in the non-band MIGHT have something in the works ... A trip back to Toronto. On an airplane... Hopefully THIS might lead them SOMEWHERE.

Now, onto MORE undertakings ... 

Settling the dust plumes

A number of days later, and I have re-appeared.

One would have thought that my return to driving seems to have unsettled the whole freaking universe. There were definite signs that "Mother Nature" was trying to one up me, this past Thursday. She and her universe of parading elements of weather forces did an excellent job of trying to keep me from my 0900 appointment.

Fortunately for the wonderful insight, and the middle aged mind & lack of sleep induced friend she left her home VERY EARLY in the morning to ensure that my arrival time for my "assessment" would not be interrupted by Mother Nature. And it wasn't.

The assessment itself wasn't very taxing, with of course the exception that I forgot that one needs draw lines from smaller numbers to larger numbers, to connect the dots. I won't go into detail, but the impact of the insult into how mortally wounded I felt in one short minute is rather life impacting. One that sorts through moments of their life, and resorts, and resorts again for  good measure doesn't do well with this kind of information rattling on and on and on in their brain. .... THIS person had to say enough ... It was a less than a MINUTE in my life ... I need to stop thinking about this. And done.

In other things that have been interesting .. For a number of months I have ALSO been rattling through my brain ... Gas LEFT, brake RIGHT ... NON STOP. (This is where the O.C.D. Thing does come in handy !) ... And visualizing moving my foot from the gas on the LEFT, to brake on the RIGHT.

I got to drive a little car ... And drive I did !! I was a very smooth operator! After not driving for close to a year ... I managed to what I thought was absolutely reasonable..... I never slammed the brakes or mixed up my peddles ... I just cruised about .. And eventually made my way to way busier streets, and was able to drive the two folks in the car back to the business park. I did stop half way, and the O.T. Said that at that point it was generally determined whether one was fit to drive, and it was up to me if I wished to drive back to the business park. I gave it a moment's thought actually. Had I had enough for the day? Would stopping the driving at that point give the O.T. Reason to conclude that I didn't have the confidence to drive, or would this show that I was over confident in my thinking, and willing to take risks that I otherwise shouldn't. One does not know what an assessor is going to interpret. I chose to carry on, as I sort of considered this the moment of sliding off a horse ... It was important to get back up on this horse, and just continue on riding ... My ability to be successful was not hindered by the "opposite" way of thinking, or the fact that I was in a smaller car, driving in an unfamiliar location, or taking direction and instruction from somebody else, or the fact that someone was in the back watching every move I made, good or bad .. Like stopping over the the stop line, a beautiful habit of 34 years of driving  ! I was able to curb that .. But probably not quickly enough.

Previously ... I was fortunate when I sat behind the little "make shift" driving apparatus ... tears welled up into my eyes .. And just said "this has just taken so long" .. I can't believe today has finally arrived, and I am here ... It is true, the time had whittled away into months upon months, and process after process, and hoops after hoops .. And amidst the momentary burst of tears that trickled from my eyes, I apologized saying that I wasn't sure if it would happen in the office, or in the car .. but at any rate ... They are really tears of rejoicing that I although I am still down a leg, I am making steps forward ..  And there I sat on a wickedly blustery violent weather filled day, looking out a window, and sitting at a driving apparatus ... That was my moment looking out to the world, where freedom of confinement would be a thing of the past!

In things that were very great in my life that day ... I had my hilarious friend with me .... Where I can definitely thank "The Universe" for her and mine paths to cross ... Only 40 short years ago. OMFG .. Holy shit .. !!!! How the dust flies ... And just when I got the plumes settled ! 

Duo Lingo

Well ... I am still waiting, with lots of GREAT things to attend to while waiting for a leg to be delivered!

So living out here ... Way on the WEST COAST ... I will admittedly say that OUR official second language is not so prevalent in our day to day life.

Growing up, going to school, being introduced to a second language all the way into the fourth grade was completely a foreign and almost un fathomable way of thinking ... All.those.years.ago.

Unfortunately, while growing up in our families home, a second language was not considered to be an asset, or a way as bettering ourselves, it was (I would think now actually) looked upon as a threat. My parents (from what I can conjure up as a memory), viewed this as something that was being crammed down our throats, rather than looked upon as an opportunity to help in putting our best foot forward. Perhaps it was a political stance that was taken, or "their" view that "the frenchies" were taking over... I an not sure of their reasoning, but all the same. I will attest that I MISSED OUT.

I remember a time when my sister approached my parents when she was in Grade 9, and ASKED for PERMISSION to be a part of the French Immersion program at our Junior High School. This was a big deal... And I remember feeling so proud of my sister for being so brave, and setting the bar higher for herself, not only for improving her knowledge, but standing up to my parents for her own sake of learning. In the end, I know my Dad was quite proud that she became bilingual.

I have a fellow that I know that speaks six PLUS languages, and another speaks three. WHEN, WHERE & HOW do you acquire this amount of learning ... Well .. It comes from being exposed to it I guess ...

Well ... And there you have it ... I was busily knitting the other day ... As I have been for months .. And I asked  myself .. "Why not me?" ... Out of the blue ... This question popped up .. And who really knows WHY the question arose ... However I interpreted it as "Why can't I learn to speak another language?" ...

Fortunately .. In this VAST day of knowledge at your fingertips ... I immediately turned to the APP store and downloaded something called "Duo Lingo" ... And I have been learning French ever since! That said ... There will NOT be a day SOON where I will be speaking French out and about and in the open ... BUT I have opened the door to opportunity!!

I think I might love that ... Now, if only I can get George Clooney to speak to me ... But he would have to do in Italian I'm thinking .. And THAT is a whole other lesson my friends ... 

Knitting in the round.

This has more than one meaning ... When you are busily knitting back together a leg .. It's round, and the cells are doing their knitting ... Along with me ... I am currently knitting a "tam" .. It's a lovely coloured tam ... And I just keep knitting and knitting with 2.5 mm needles ... That is quite the small scale of knitting I will admit!

So I am not sure what the situation with this non broke, but broken in a way knitting mishap I have going on in the leg. It is genuinely doing it's thing ... And taking it's freaking time . I guess it's just really pissed that it is being forced back together .. Without it's consent. Little does the very tiny wound know that I consented to this a great while ago, and it's time for it to get itself on board the healing train, and heal ... Like NOW.

I have some "prisma" set inside the edge, which has been there for a week for or two .. And it's still hissy fitting it's way to the bitter end ... I will rephrase that thought ... "BETTER end" ... I was sincerely hoping that in less than a week this would be gone, and I am of course hopeful that it will be. For "holy-don't-feel-like-swearing-this-second-sake" ....

In other things for real:

Still TWO days away from the driving thing. Holy SHIT .. Could time stand still any quicker?  Even after I complete that assessment .. I will be waiting for information to exchange hands ... And THAT somedays takes forever !!!!!

I have decided to let my book go that I was reading .. Sorry Alexander McCall Smtih ... Not excited about your Bertie book this time around, I think it would be OK, I am just not that deeply committed to trying to like a book any longer ... There are just so many to read anyways .. I will stick with the REALLY good ones! ... However ... I do love the "#1 Ladies Detective Agency books" ... Now those are the cutest things going!

Oh, and beetled off to Tim Horton's today ... I caught up with the man that makes changes ... He was looking at a door .. I pointed out the task of maneuvering through the parking lot being a  "disabled person" ... And  asked him if he could change the configuration of the cement barricades for disabled people ... He said they never considered the issues  ... Until I pointed it out to him ...

In the meantime ... This wild woman will remain at her post ... Knitting in the round ... Or however that is going down today in these parts!

LOOK. AT. THESE!!!!!!

So, in adventures that would be considered HOARDING ... (Or not!), I have purchased these OLD & yet  elegant spoons from Europe. How exciting for me .. I'm onto some hopefully greater adventures in the old spoon resurrecting department.

I know, all of YOU, my ever so faithful readers are now immensely jealous. How could you not be? Who wouldn't want 16 collector spoons .. ? Pinterest here I come!! (I ALREADY have something in mind! .. So even though I can not get out to  purchase my wares of whimsy ... I am somehow bringing them to me anyways!!

Hop to it I say ...

Hello and welcome to the most grandiose blog on the internets. Apart from the beautiful colours, pretty fonts &swirls, plus an outdated photo ... Things here are pretty much the "how to" of creating excitement in a life that very much qualifies for the hands down title of  "The Life of a Duldrum Addict".

For real.

Did I mention I planted some primulas? I did. That was spectacular!!! I might have mentioned that too, apologies. Did I also mention that in an effort to plant them, there was teamwork involved. That is where the husbandman came in. He drove me to the garden center, carried the dirt, and the plants to the car and from the car,  and found the pots, and got a tarp, and put everything on the back of the girlie girls car, and poured the dirt, and stood there ... While I took the primilas out of their containers, and put dirt around them. Whala! I planted something! But here's the big kicker folks ... I smelled dirt, and got to feel plant life beneath my fingertips, I got to make the decision as to "yes, let's just put these in this pot" ... And then watched as he set them on the front steps. I might have mentioned all this ... So sad you are doing a read over ... However .. I am still thrilled at the gift of time and experience of doing such a simple endeavour with the kind hearted husbandman. And THAT is the feeling that I am stuck on. Plus, the primulas are pretty.

In other things ...

The task of the impossible "driving" is still on the scale of over the top ridiculous .. And numerous times a day I am hearing myself talking away in my head ... This is the process, this is the process, this is the process, this is the process ... All the while I just keep seeing the sands of time attached to little pieces of helium, and rather than falling gently on top of one another .. They just sort of sit in the hourglass and gently hover about, never really reaching their destination.  If one has ever wanted to time travel so freaking badly in their life, it would be right about now.

NEXT week ... NEXT Monday ... I will go back and see the orthopedic surgeon ... A make work project, yet again. IT will be THIS moment in time, when my time traveling will have finally paid off, as it will be THIS moment when the road to freedom will happen! AT least one can assume this .. Which I willy nilly am going to stick to.

In other things that impact this life:

Growth.

There's an ebb and flow to parenthood I would surmise. You watch, and nurture, and mentor, and navigate, and guide. Then there's the fleeting moments of all this natural back and forth when one needs to leap .. And whether it's taking that leap of faith, or leaping onto unsteady ground, the leap has to take place, amidst the ebb and flow, in order to move on. Leaping is hard, probably not as hard as hopping, but leaping is knowing that there might be that soft landing, or a sense of balance once you have worked up the courage to leap. Both of these children are at the ebb and flow stage that leaping might be the best things for them, in their personal growth. I can see it, however; as all these parental duties are configuring around them ... How do I encourage that LEAP, without encouraging that leap ... Is it TIME.  Time and growth, growth and time. I will have to see which one plays out. They are both so ready.

Let's just hop to it ...