HAPPY November 26th.

This time next month we will be stuffed to the brim with the christmas craziness, and winding down on the years events whilst sucking back baked left overs, and wine.  Or maybe that's just me.  It has been a great many months since I have visited this place, and as per usual, I can't seem to get into my blog. I can get into an old blog, one that doesn't really exist on line .. but it's there all the same. So now I have this weird editor gadgety device, and I get into my blog this way. Go me. Go figure! Since my time being here, I have started working again. Yes, true true true ... I am a worker bee once again. Sort of happy, but then not happy about it. That said .... I will preface ANYTHING I write with a "thankful statement" .. which I am thankful for my new little job. I really am. HOWEVER; it is a clerical position, which will lead to absolutely nowhere, and given that I work in a union environment, I am left to the disadvantage of not being able to make more money, until the employer with it's heels dug into the ground ascends to the unions threats and demands. That is usually how it goes. The other side of this is something on a more personal note, one that "eats" at me. One that I am too sensitive about, and shouldn't be. It's the stigma. The assumption that I am a nobody in this world that has never evolved herself enough to move beyond working as a clerk.  It's been an interesting adventure so far, the people that work in the office are lovely. All with their own missions, and work details. Then there's the outer perimeter of people that flounce through, and will not regard you with all their youth & assimilated importance. It's not really a big problem, as time will catch up with them as well, so it's best that I just sit back for that movie to unfold. Again, it's something that niggles away at you. So I just work away silently ... as the important ones attend to their meetings and bypass the lesser folks. I am totally grateful for the fellow I work with. He is hilarious and equally mindblowingly intelligent. My bet is he will run the hospital one day. His business practice and vision will improve our healthcare delivery at a phenomenal rate. Somebody give him the million bucks now. He's going to win at this.  In the meantime, I have learned a couple of things along the way. If I am at a stumbling black what do I do .. ? Well the answer that I have learned is "improve your position" ... so I have decided to do just that. In October I will embark in 8 months of courses, which will lead me away from my current position, to a better paying position, and one with the opportunity to grow. Because it's important to grow when one should otherwise be winding down from their working life, no?  But what about my painting ... couldn't I just paint my pictures, and sell my pieces at the local artisan market & craft fairs? Again, improving my position on that one, including improving my painting skills would be an asset. I have watched my friend leave her job in life, and become this makeshift artist, which she is .. sort of, but her creativity isn't going deep enough. One day she will look at her projects and think to herself .. WHAT THE FRUITBARS was I thinking ..  Not that her work isn't creative. My thing is .. her projects are not creative enough. What I am seeing from her artwork is quantity, not quality. So says me, the absolutely art critic if there ever was one. I am hoping once she slows down and really looks, she will see the same thing. What can one say .... but let her live the process.  My leg is pretty much hurting me badly today. I'm not even sure why. I made a pit stop at the drive thru earlier today, and bought a cup of tea, and soup, and ate it in my car, before I adventured to the next grocery store for shopping treasures ... typically I do not have to do that any longer, as the leg has much more stamina, but not today SATAN .. not today. I do not make a habit of taking off the liner this early into the day .. but I can't get it to settle down, so the best thing I can do, is remove the leg, and the liner, and just let it sit. Silly leg, does it not know how much it really impacts my life not being able to waltz around this earth doing as I please??? Earlier today, just as I was leaving the grocery store I saw a woman who for years I secretly admired who go go go attitude, she was always just busy doing things... I used to see her in a hair salon when I used to take my boy for haircuts ... and I saw her today ... she was sitting in a lightweight wheelchair, and I thought, oh maybe time has caught up with her, or she had broken her foot ... but no, her leg was missing. NOT THIS LITTLE BUSY BEE lady ... I felt so truly sad for her .. very truly sad. I hope she too regains her mobility, I value mine, despite my constant painful struggle. It's just an uphill climb ... all the time, but you get used to it.  Happy November 26.